#5891
Herindoors
Participant

Hi Doglover.
You have a choice to either start what you know will probably be the end of the relationship or do what we have all done for years and go ahead with the trip and try and make it a nice Christmas. But you know your son will not react well to it and you are likely to end up worrying about him. Not trying to guilt trip you in anyway – I do understand the complications x
I had a similar situation last Christmas although not so extreme. I was borderline about to say I wanted the marriage to end and so trying to play happy families was torture. So we would have spats and I would use that as an excuse not to go to events etc… The tension built up and up and eventually lead to the violent incident that split us up for good.
If you are seriously considering telling him then firstly you must be safe so only do it as part of a safe plan you have already organised with a DV worker. Otherwise you might find yourself like me, in a very frightening situation which is out of control. Like me you know that if you say ‘it’ there are going to be consequences and that’s really scary to face – so get your support lined up first.
Take care x*x

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