White Rose

Hi Tamra
What you’re feeling seems to be a common things lots of us post similar thoughts and probably more feel exactly like you. It’s ok to feel sad and it’s ok to feel confused.
You sat you’re not sure you’ve accepted what he did was wrong but you know it was. What’s hard to accept is that he had the audacity to do it to you. Maybe we all feel that abuse doesn’t happen to people like us it’s like cancer and accidents – happens to others. It takes time to accept it and I’m not sure I’m there yet either.
Don’t be hard on yourself.
When I doubt my self I get out my old phone and listen to the recording I made of him screaming abuse at me. I read his texts and emails and the list I made as evidence of events and I remember how I used to feel scared and on eggshells the whole time. Then I realise I’m better and safer away from him.
I think we all have a bit of PTSD who wouldn’t! it’s traumatic!
Don’t be afraid to ask for extra help from your GP. I hated asking for help from anyone initially and I regret it now as it made me worse.
Hang on in there. You’re doing great. You’re stronger than you think. x*x

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