Hi sugar,
Welcome to the forum, what a brave first post, that must have taken a lot of bravery to write.
You have described some serious abuse and it sounds like you have lived with a high level of abuse and still continue to do so. It is completely normal to have the fears that you have about telling professional services about what is happening, especially after everything that has happened, but please don’t worry about how they will react. You have proven to social services in the past that you ca protect your children despite what you are going through which they should take that into account. Plus they will help you to make the important steps to keeping your partner away from you which is what you need. Another point to consider is that if social services and the police don’t have the most recent abuse logged and in the future your partner goes for joint custody, then there will be less evidence of what has been happening than there should be and that might work in his favour. I know it is scary but they are there to support and protect you. Making these vital steps make be just what you need to stay away for good.
You have been so brave by coming on here and talking about this, please continue to do so. You have had such great support from the wonderful women on this forum, I hope you can find the next lot of strength to make the next step.
Good to have you with us Sugar.
Best wishes
Lisa
Forum Moderator