Hi Mixed up Mum

I think you may have the answer right there – you put up with it because you wanted a happy family, and at the time we thought that meant putting up with whatever it was they were doing to us. I did exactly the same, although the issues are different. In fact, it wasn’t until he left me that I realised I was suffering so much as a result of how he was treating me. Like you, I find writing it down helps. I have looked over what I had written three years ago, when I had severe mental health issues which confused my doctors, and I can’t understand why I didn’t tell anyone about it or why I didn’t run for the hills the minute he started treating me like that.

I now know from the things my very young daughter says, that it was completely wrong to stay.

It’s important we forgive ourselves for this – at the time we did the best we could with the awareness that we had, and focus now on our new awareness and deciding what we do now.


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