PS when I say I experienced guided cage to an extent, I mean he used the fact that we had a nice house ( which I slogged away to maintain- not him) to argue that I should just be happy, shut up and put up with his behaviour, and not want anything more, like kindness or a career where I felt counted, and which enabled me to buy the things I or kids wanted and holiday. The kids and I should be happy being in the house, serving him like minions. He was a King of the Castle abuser x

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