lover of no contact

Hi marthamoo,

Well done for securing the nursery place. That is the start towards no contact with him. Don’t worry about the feelings that lay ahead that you will have to feel as you break free for him.

Take one day at a time with your feelings (just post on here with your feelings ) and we’ll support you. You will move through them. Don’t be afraid of breaking free from him for good. Yes it is difficult, but lots of us on here have done it. We know how difficult it is (due to having loved them and made worse by the ‘trauma-bond’). You will get through this by taking it one day at a time.

Small steps are all that are needed. He cunningly manipulated you back into contact with him. They all do that. That has happened to most of us one time or another. We are trusting and normal (and busy with life and children so its not always possible to be aware). They are devious, cunning, manipulative and subtle.

You have overcome a lot of hurdles. You have a house without him. You are setting up childcare without him.

No need to tell him you are cutting him out of your life and telling him its over. You don’t owe an abuser any explanations. He lost the right to an explanation the day he started abusing you. Just start carrying out small actions everyday with a view to cutting him out of your life and post the feelings that arise on here.

You will get through this.

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