Main Moderator

Hi Lilbird,

Thank you for your post. I just wanted to show you some support and to let you know that how you are feeling is very normal and natural. Of course what you wanted was a happy family and it is only human to think what if.. but with an abuser that was never going to happen. If you can get to a point where you can both support your child safely and without arguments then that is great but just remember it is not your fault that things went ‘wrong’… it is his fault for being abusive and any thoughts that perhaps you could have tried harder etc are not relevant when with an abuser as ‘trying harder’ in an abusive relationship simply translates as ‘staying silent’…

You have done brilliantly and been so strong. Keep holding your head up high. We are all here for you.

Best wishes,


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