mixed-up mum

Hi Eve, sorry you are feeling no better today.

I had a reasonable nights sleep, so do feel a bit more able to get on with things today – and I’m determined that I WILL get things underway today!!!

It’s a mega miserable day outside – blowing a gale and lashing rain on my window – so I have not actually DONE anything today yet – but I do have hopes I will achieve something today!!
I think I will have to do what one of my friends does and write a ‘to do list’ each day and work my way through it – I’m sure it must be a great sense of achievement to cross things off the list and to know that it has been delt with and is out of the way – and one less problem to think of.

That’s my trouble, it all piles up on me, so much to see to, and things that need doing – and it gets to me so much that I then don’t know where to start!!!

Such a shame you were not able to answer the helpline call.

I know just how you feel, its even an effort to get in the shower dome days – yesterday it took me until 4-30 to be showered, dressed, hair done and ready for town to go and pick up my daughter. That was a major effort for me to be able to do that and get in to town and do the weekly food shop – but I knew I HAD TO do it- no one else was going to do it for me and it had to be done.
That’s the thing when I KNOW there are things that have to be done then I do (eventually!!!!) just do it, but I put things off time and time again until there is no option but do it.

Yesterday I did finally manage to get some washing done!! Will have to iron today as kids need clothes.

The other thing I put off and put off every year is my tax returns, Im self-employed (but on a VERY small scale) and do I have this to do every year – but I’m so useless with figures, that it’s a major struggle for me (and I don’t make near enough to pay an accountant to do it) I know I have to do (or risk a £100 fine) so in the end I do do it, but I’m ALWAYS in the last days of Jan to do it!!!!

So today I am determined I WILL get up and get my tax return done, and I will do the dishes, and I will do the ironing – that’s 3 things/goals I have set myself to do today – and so I hope by the end of the day I CAN say to you I have done that!!!! 🙂

I’m still burying my head in the sand re my finances, I know I have to be very careful with money, and hope I can survive into April when I MAY have the chance of some more work.

No one can nor should tell you to ‘get on with it’ as NO ONE actually knows how it feels to be you, and how it feels to be where you are right now – you are doing your best to get through this right now the only way you know how – and we all need a little help and support from time to time – and I get how you feel when your mam says “other people are worse off” – yes they may well be – but you at this precise moment in time are going through a very tough time and its not a great comfort to know others are worse off!!

Me mam can be a bit like that too – a bit blunt and to the point – her comments at times (though well intended) can be a bit hurtful and not altogether ‘helpful’!!!!

You just gotta shrug it off, and say to yourself she means well, and did not intended to hurt you, and then carry on as best you can…..

Hope you get on OK today and your daughter is feeling better soon.

Have sent you a little private message, hope you find it OK.

Take care.

Love M.U.M. x*x

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