Hey, who said you had to get brilliant at something to relax yourself?! The tiredness thing could be a catch 22. You seem pretty low, and doing something, no matter how small, that is for you and that you enjoy will start you feeling better. One of the things on your list could be simply to put fresh sheets on the bed, have a nice bath and go to bed early, leaving all electronics downstairs. Have you told a GP how you are feeling?

I understand you need people in your life – most people do. I wonder from what you’ve said about friends whether you need this so much that you’ll tolerate poor treatment, as even that seems better than being alone. Enjoying some of the time you spend alone will make you so much more resilient to other people’s bad behaviour, because you’ll be happier to let them go if you are being treated poorly.

And no no no, you cannot force someone into coming to see you. If they want to, they will. What about saying something like “It’s my birthday on X day, and I’d really like to have a girly night in with friends. Would you like to come?” I’m so sorry about your dad. Of course it’s not disrespectful to do something to mark your birthday, if that’s what you want to do


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