This topic contains 8 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  thankgoodness 2 weeks, 2 days ago.

  • Author
    Posts
  • #97480
     thankgoodness 
    Participant

    Another very serious incident happened to me today from my abuser so I spoke to someone on a support helpline. This is the second time in two weeks that a very serious incident has happened to me from the same abuser. I’m not involving police. But I am suffering. I would say I am a survivor because even though I have been through domestic abuse for years, I still say to myself keep strong, keep calm and carry on. But how long do I have to keep saying I’m a survivor??????…really I’m suffering!!!!…the abuser is getting away with doing these very serious incidents to me. I’m lucky I’m alive, I will survive this. One day the abuser will go to prison if he doesn’t stop seriously abusing me.

  • #97481
     thankgoodness 
    Participant

    And about three weeks ago I was beaten up 4 days in a row by the same abuser. Beaten up, beaten up, beaten up and beaten up.

  • #97482
     KIP. 
    Participant

    It sounds like things are escalating. Abuse always gets worse. I’d definitely report this to the police. He won’t stop until someone makes him. Can you move out or go into a refuge?

  • #97485
     thankgoodness 
    Participant

    I can’t move out because I have to help other family members. I help with washing and other stuff. I wish it was easy to move out but it’s so complicated and if I leave, it’s seen as shame to my family, they might never speak to me again.

  • #97486
     KIP. 
    Participant

    Could you ask the police to say that someone made an anonymous complaint about how your abuser abuses you? That way you won’t be seen as exposing their behaviour. Take photos of any injuries and save them somewhere safe. Have you spoken to your local women’s aid? Or to your GP? The violence will get worse and they have no right to touch you. It’s illegal and dangerous and you deserve so much more.

  • #97491
     thankgoodness 
    Participant

    I will try to find my local women’s aid, I have never visited them before but I will go to them. The police and my GP are fed up of my abuser. My GP wants to help but the abuser needs to refer himself to get help, the GP cannot force him.

    I have had a long think and I have got my luggage out…I’m just waiting for the right time to leave…maybe in a few months…I’m not sure.

  • #97501
     Lisa 
    Main Moderator

    Hi there Thankgoodness, you can find the details for your local domestic abuse service here, they will be able to help you to plan for leaving if this is what you want to do. You could also get some support from Women’s Aid through the Live Chat.

    Best wishes

    Lisa

  • #97503
     Escapee 
    Participant

    I may be making an assumption here and I apologise if I am but I picked up on your fear of being shunned by the family. If you’re from a cultural/religious minority and you’re based in the UK this organisation may be able to help http://www.asianwomencentre.org.uk

    More and more women in these communities are standing up to the abuse they have endured so there may be specialist help available (plus ringfenced funding!).

    Good luck, keep strong, keep safe.

  • #97578
     thankgoodness 
    Participant

    Thank you everyone, I will take your advice. This is the first time in years that I feel there is ‘a light at the end of the tunnel’.

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