A poem about leaving

[GreenHope]

Hi all, I hope this is allowed! I am no poet – I haven’t written creatively for over 20 years which is one of the great sadnesses of life with my abuser. But today a poem came to me out of the blue and I think you might be the only people who would understand it…

It was Winter when I left
before the first birthday of mine
that I couldn’t let you have
Resolved
Cold
Wrapped in long nights and flickering hopes

Hours spent walking, soothing, settling our sweet girl
Tiny warm hands and a cold nose
Two, three, four in the morning
I walked, holding her close
Watching the frosty sparkle settle onto the pavements
The world slept
but not completely

You weren’t there to take a turn
You weren’t there to share the burden
The peace in that was so loud

My soul was thrashing
Grieving, doubting, learning
The peace was louder than it all

I didn’t just dance in the kitchen
I danced through every doorway
I hugged my knees in the bath
to remind myself to cry

I doubted, I knew
I unpicked, I forgot
I remembered

Was I a shell? Or was I all of me?

Spring was visiting and retreating when the answer came
As I sparkled and wept
Laughter ran deeper
Hopes turned into dreams
rather than academic options
Friends pulled closer
where they belonged
Phone conversations as long as they needed to be
Unobserved
Free
My gaze lifted
Fleeting connections with strangers arrived like warm sun on my skin

Even in the stuttering way of Spring’s beginning
I have my answer

The woman on the other side is more
I’m excited to know me in Summer
Wrapped in long days and sunlight
Familiar and New

[StrongLife]

Expressive and wonderful poem.

Poetry is good to get things out. Creative endeavours are always good ways to change thoughts too.

[Healingspirit]

Thank you so much for sharing

[Phenomenon]

Wonderfully resonating for me and many others on this forum.
thank you so much.

stay safe and keep expressively writing! you are amazing!

Phenomenon x

[tiredanddrained]

💖 this. Really beautiful and hit home.

Thank you so much for sharing it 💫❤️xx

[Author]

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