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Hi, ive recently left my home and ive been very aware i have been in an abusive and mentally relationship. When i was (age removed by moderator) i had a stillbirth he wasnt violent then. But he constantly cheated on me blamed me for him cheating ect.. Then i fell pregant again the violence started before i was pregnant this time he just belittled me and was mentally abusive. Except one time when he threw (detail removed by moderator). I lost the baby i had a late miscarriage we dont know why it happened. Well when my then boy friend first got with me he cheated on me a lot and gave me (detail removed by moderator). We broke up i got rid of it we got back together a few months after this was after i had a stillbirth. So after all the mental and violace i left he just wouldnt stop hurting me. I have been harrased since then he has come to my work looking for me he has come to where ive been staying.i have managed to avoid him both times.i have been constantly getting abusive messages and threats and blackmail. One of those being he is going to (detail removed by moderator) without me. I waited until he wasnt in took my key to the property and took my stepdad for protection. I went inside i took my childrens memory boxs and both ashes and left. Ive has threats and abuse on texts as they are going to the police about “breaking and entering” and taking my memomory boxs and ashes of me. I know im going to the police. Im young ive only just come to terms with what kind of relationship. I dont know what to say to the police i just want him to leave me alone and have my babies and my memory boxs.i have confessions of abuse and manipulated texts on my phone what do i do
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Hi Newneedadvice
Welcome to the forum, and thank you for sharing what you are going through and reaching out for help.
You have done amazingly to have got away from your abusive ex partner after all he has done to you. If he is harassing you and you feel able to report this to the police that is a really good first step, keep all the messages he is sending you as evidence to show them.
You may be able to get a non molestation order which is an injunction that would notify him that he is not allowed to contact you or come to your home, if he has turned up at your work you may be able to get your work address included in the order. You can contact DV Assist to discuss getting a non molestation order.
You may also want to contact your local domestic abuse service for some ongoing support, you can search for your local service here.
Alternatively you can always contact the 24hr helpline on 0808 2000 247 to speak confidentially to a female helpline worker about your situation.
You do not have to go through this alone, we are here to support you.
Take care and keep posting
Lisa
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Hi Newneedadvice, well done in posting on here, it takes a lot of courage to even do this simple thing. I am so sorry for your losses, my daughter has suffered numerous miscarriages also, it’s utterly heartbreaking and to deal with DA also at the same time, all I can say is that you are an amazing woman who has so much strength and courage(even though you dont feel you have). Going to the police is so difficult, many of us are terrified of doing so. Have you contacted women’s aid(WA) yet,, they have their own solicitors who deal with domestic abuse, they will listen to you and so importantly, they will believe you. When you contact the police, let them know you want to deal with someone eho knows about domestic abuse, how scared you are, you can have someone with you too. You didn’t do anything wrong in any of these relationships, these type of men prey on us. It’s ridiculous to the extreme,to say the least, but unless you’ve lived with an abuser, no-one can possibly get how it makes you feel, how it sneaks up on you. I think of them as human vampires, who suck the good from us.
I don’t think there’s a case to answer to with regards you retrieving your children’s memory boxes and personal treasures, you had a key, I take it you’ll still have other belongings there too, so that proves you lived there. Just because someone walks out, going back for your things is not breaking and entering, you had a key. They are trying to intimidate you, so that you’ll not press any charges. You did what’s right fir you sweetheart, you’ve dealt with so much, the end is in sight.
Much love and strength to youIWMB đź’•đź’•
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