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    • #51163
      Mummyboo
      Participant

      Hi everyone,
      I’ve been separated a few months now and I left because of physical and emotional abuse but I’m starting to think it may have been sexual too. My husband was the first and only person I ever had sex with so I’m at a loss about what happens in a healthy relationship.
      For the past few years I had really gone off sex and really only did it as an obligation- the thought of it would make me sick and I would only feel relief that it I did it it would mean I would get a least a day or so off being pestered. If I ever said I didn’t want to or was too tired he would say if I didn’t he would have an affair. His favourite joke was to text me when I was in another room “thank god for the internet” which basically meant it was a good job he could get porn as I was obviously so frigidNow that I’ve written this out I’ve basically answered my own question but would like to hear your thoughts too.

    • #51166
      itmustbemesurely
      Participant

      my ex said that too, if I didn’t want him plenty of women did, he could go off with anyone…he still does it now even though we been apart a couple of months…..I was the same, didn’t want it/him so was passionless and frigid, i too just went along with it for a quiet life..can’t remember the last time I enjoyed being intimate x*x

    • #51167
      KIP.
      Participant

      I think you need to ask yourself if you would ever coerce someone into sex or threaten and blackmail to go elsewhere. Not only that but would you actually want to have sex with someone you had to coerce or threaten into it. I think it takes a very sick individual to do this. Mine actually had sex when I was crying! Sick perverted ugly behaviour. If you feel like talking it through, Rape Crisis have a fantastic helpline x

    • #51188
      Ayanna
      Participant

      Every sexual activity that is non consensual is rape.

      It took me long too to admit this to myself.
      There is no domestic abuse without rape.

      Google the Power and Control Wheel.
      All forms of abuse are present in an abusive relationship, they just vary on a daily basis.

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