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    • #147702
      Strongenough
      Participant

      I need a little vent. I’m not sure when I started to feel low but this last week has been particularly difficult. I’m using a combination of alcohol and sleeping tablets to get through. The flashbacks have been coming very often and its hard to cope with. I know this isn’t the answer because I’ve been here before. It’s like I’m now abusing myself by overeating and over drinking, I caught sight of myself in a mirror today and I look awful, weight gain, dull skin and generally just worn out.

      Well no more!! I’m writing this post to keep myself accountable, there Is something more powerful about posting on this forum as opposed to writing in a journal.

      It’s time for self care and not self destruction. I need to be eating better, curbing the drinking and making sure I am exercising. I may be out of the relationship but I’m realising the fight to survive isn’t over. This time it’s me v me and I need to keep fighting for the person I was before the abuse.

      Thanks for reading x

    • #147711
      nbumblebee
      Participant

      I hear you. I self harm and i am currently not eating well just enough for me to get by its another form of punishing myself for still being here.
      Exercise is my life saver writing in here too makes me accountable when i feel the need to self harm i come here i may only write a comment to someone try and help them through but it stops me makes me think makes me realise others are here and im not alone.
      Its so good to hear your last paragraph its what im trying so hard to do too it isnt easy and its nessy and i dont think we can do it alone, do you have help? Support? I know you are out but you can still reach out for some help in processing all the hurt and pain you really deserve to find that you again. Im looking for me a me that ive never known not really hey we can do this together along with every ither woman here needing to fight and find herself. Reach out dont do this alone, yes we are the only ones that can save ourselves we must be our own heroes but it doesnt mean we cant accept help love support. You got this sweetie go find her xxxxxx

    • #147721
      Strongenough
      Participant

      Thanks for replying Nbumblebee. I am not with support services at the moment but I have been in the past which has given me the tools to recognise and address when I’m feeling this way.

      The beauty of this forum is that by reaching out you realise you are not alone,and during tough times the support on here is so comforting, your post really helped me. I feel i have reset myself a bit and didnt binge last night. Thank you and please keep working on yourself, small goals and babysteps are still a move in the right direction ❤️

      • #147725
        nbumblebee
        Participant

        Sweetie always here if you need me feel free to lrivate nessage if you need too anything to stop you harming yourself this forum and the ladies on here has held me up more times than i can say.
        Sending you hugs keep going keep pushing keep believeing xxxx

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