Anxiety up the roof

[Shocknawe]

I feel so anxious every day I think I will explode – I am very unmotivated to do any sports, I cannot sit still to try meditation and I just don’t know what to do with my body. I keep grinding my teeth and pacing. Work is a struggle. I am already on meds. Anyone has any other ideas? This is very difficult.

[ISOPeace]

Hi there, I’ve experienced debilitating anxiety so I really feel for you. It is truly horrible. Anxiety is trying to keep me safe, it’s actually lost perspective. It’s like a burglar alarm that has started going off when a fly comes into the room. This might feel like it’s ‘on the safe side’ but actually, if it’s busy looking out for flies, it doesn’t have as much capacity to look out for real threats. So being on overdrive is counterproductive and of course very stressful. But you can retrain the alarm system not to overreact. In my experience there are both surface level and more in depth ways to address it. It sounds like you need to work on the surface level symptoms at the moment. Here are some thoughts:

1. Has the medications helped at all? If yes, perhaps you need to ask your GP about increasing the dose. If no, have you been taking it long enough for it to have an effect? If yes, perhaps you need to ask about trying something else.
2. Anxiety tells you that it needs 100% of your attention or there will be some terrible consequence. It is very compelling and most of us are too overwhelmed by it to realise that it has gone into overdrive. If you can accept that the anxiety isn’t telling you the truth and choose not to do what it wants, you start to retrain the alarm system. Every time you do what the anxiety wants, you tell the alarm system that it’s doing the right thing by going off when there’s a fly. Whereas every time you don’t do what it wants, you’re telling it that it’s ok to not alert you to all the flies in the room. Over time the alarm stops going off at the flies and can focus on the real issues without all the stress.
3. In my experience, advice like go for a walk, exercise etc is really helpful in managing anxiety, but when it’s reached a high level, those things alone may not feel like enough. I would still recommend doing things like going for a walk, because everything you do adds up. Also, when we put everything on hold because we feel so anxious, we’re reinforcing the belief that the anxiety is telling us the truth. All the self care things you can do help retrain the alarm system by telling your mind that it is ok to not listen to the anxiety.
4. I have used tapping/EFT to help manage anxiety. It sounds a bit crazy, but I found it really helpful and from what I’ve read it helps most people. Literally 10 mins of tapping could calm me down. I used an app called the Tapping Solution.
5. I’ve heard other people on here talk about using grounding techniques, but I’m not too familiar with those.

I really hope you find something that works for you soon. The good news is that anxiety is very treatable. You won’t feel like this forever. Sending love xxxx

[Shocknawe]

Thank you ISOPeace – I had never heard of tapping. I will try it. I keep telling myself to go out for a walk or run but I find it too hard. I cannot even make my bed.
Thank you for the support.

[ISOPeace]

That sounds really horrible and overwhelming. Just take baby steps. Even the tiniest step will help.

There’s a CBT type technique called exposure therapy, where you have a goal of something you want to do, but the anxiety is stopping you. Then you break it down into parts and order them from easiest to hardest and try to work up the list. The idea is that you don’t dive straight in at the deep end and allow yourself to be overwhelmed, you just challenge yourself a little more each time. It’s not easy, but every little step you take helps you break free of the hold that the anxiety has on you. Plus it can help you feel less powerless, because you’re taking positive action.

Also don’t be disheartened if friends/family give well intentioned but unhelpful advice, which can make you feel like you should be able to find some quick fix solution but you’re not trying hard enough. I think it’s really hard to understand what debilitating anxiety feels like unless you’ve experienced it or something similar. People often compare it to when they’ve felt a bit anxious, which is understandable but it’s a bit like comparing a 5 minute stroll with an ultra marathon. Just know that they mean well, but much like with domestic abuse, they don’t necessarily know enough about it to be able to give helpful advice. Xxxx

[Anonymous]

I wonder whether some online Pilates or yoga might help… start with brief 10 minutes abs build up to more if it helps you? I can relate to being unmotivated to get outside for exercise but find it easier if I know I can just do something at home for a really short time…

[Eggshells]

Hi Shocknawe

I can see that you’ve had some really great advice already.

I can really relate to that feeling of not being able to find the motivation to do what you know you need to do to lift yourself out of this.

When I get like that, I use binaural beats. No effort required. I get them from an app called insight timer. I actually don’t like the sound that binaural beats make so I go for ones which have calming music over the top.

I also have a playlist of uplifting and empowering songs which I find helps. At times, even these simple easy ideas feel like too much effort but if you can force yourself to do the least effortful things, they might just lift you enough to help you head out for a walk.

I really hope you manage to find something that gives you a starting point. It’s horrible to feel so low and anxious that you loose all motivation. Sending hugs and good vibes. xx

[Put the kettle on]

Hi, I too have anxiety. I find short distractions helpful when it’s extremely high.
Suggestions: scrub something like kitchen sink
Watch favourite tv show
Clean just one cupboard/shelf
Do a crossword
Call someone

I find little things to do that I can add on yo yet little enough I don’t have to concentrate too much. It’s just that tiny break in the anxiety cycle then try to do another and another. The anxiety comes back but that little distraction break really helps.

Super importantly try to keep a good sleep routine (very hard for me) and eat healthy where possible even if it’s one piece extra of fruit or a glass of water.

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