broken

[Worrywart]

Hi ladies …i must sound like a broken record but i need to vent again, sorry in advance ….i still cant get over the fact that my ex has walked away from our relationship like i don’t exist! its been just over (detail removed by moderator) since i ended our relationship, together over 2 decades, i just cant get my head around it at all! ….i’m grieving still and after a couple of weeks of us ending, he has moved on into a new relationship, engaged and moving in with her soon (and of course he had to rub my face in it) life is moving forward in leaps and bounds for him and i’m still stuck in the same place as if it was yesterday, what type of person can do this to another human being? I JUST DONT GET IT!!!

[Put the kettle on]

Hi, it’s got to be awful to see him with someone else. I was in a long-term relationship too and am waiting for the day I see him with someone else. As much as we don’t want to be with them it’s still upsetting.

You are moving on and forward, in a healthier way. You’re dealing with the end of your relationship and processing what happened. You’re going to be stronger from this.

[HopeLifeJoy]

Hi sweety, it must be hard especially after two decades being together. Maybe if you see him as an addict needing to secure a victim to abuse, as a spider needing to suffocate his prey into his web holding her hostage then sucking her dry. If you see him as the perpetrator he is and using other human beings as pure prey maybe just maybe it helps to understand how he is able to move on so quickly. He is an abuser and abusing others is all he ever does. He is not creative, he goes from one prey to the next. You have been very strong having endured his abuse for such a long time. Incredibly strong. And whatever you’ll build now, your new life, it might be at a slow pace but it’ll be solid and well protected.
You take it step by step. Concentre on you and find out what you wish to do with your life, it is your turn now and your dreams come first.
Rant away always, this is what this place is for, sending you hugs and strength 💕💪

[Worrywart]

thank you for your replies ladies x

[KIP.]

It’s okay to have these feelings and they will come and go for quite some time. That’s the normal health grieving process. Deep down, ask yourself would you really want him back? For him to begin his abuse all over again. It may seem like he’s moving forward but he’s really not. He will stagnate in his misery and delusional behaviour until his new victim works out that she’s won the booby prize and not first prize like we all thought initially. By then you will be well on the road to recovery. I was decades with my abuser and I thought I’d never recover but if you could see my life now you’d be amazed. You can do it too. I hope today is a better day for you. Do something nice for yourself x

[KIP.]

To answer your question. The type of person that can do this to another human being is a shallow selfish person totally lacking in empathy and any moral compass. The type of person you definitely don’t want in your life x

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