Bucket List

[Serenity]

I so want to write a bucket list.

When I met him, I was so adventurous.

I’m going to make a list of things to do, things he would never ‘allow’ me to do. It’s occurred to me how they greeted us like children. He was more dictatorial than my own parents were.

[Dragonfly]

Hi

The awful person I was with stopped me doing things and stopped me being me too.

However, your bucket list…… It may happen in a different way. I say that because since I left I’ve done things that ‘weren’t allowed’

I’ve spoke to people including men!! I’ve worn the clothes I like and been complimented, I’ve been pillion on a motorbike, I’m going on holiday, I’m good at my job, I’ve had a friend from Germany stay at my house last week (in spare room). A male friend! Shock horror! There was no fear or suspicion around him staying at mine either.

The thing is all these things have just happened by default. Because it’s normal behaviour. This is what I did pre abuse.

So your bucket list is a great idea. Just remember these good things may come to you before you go searching for them. It’s great 😀

[Lovewithoutcause]

Bucket list is a great idea. I always had things in my head which I wanted to do. Since splitting I vowed to make a start on ticking things off. Skydive is one of those things…I’m about to do my second jump next weekend. But my bucket list isn’t just adventurous things like this. It’s also things like taking the dog to the beach, eating what I choose, going out with friends and basically living life.

[starchild]

Mine went off and did my bucket list and prevented me from joining him or undertaking the activities myself.
The one thing I can do is train at the moment, so that when its sorted I can do the items on my bucket list without him tagging along or undertaking them on my behalf, because Iam spoilt and not worthy or that I’m not clever enough or fit enough ..

Wrong …My time will come 🙂

[SunshineRainflower]

This is a great idea Serenity! My ex abuser used to hate it when I sang because I have a nice voice and it made me joyful, they hate to see us happy and full of life because they are such miserable creatures! I’d also like to book a few trips, visit some friends in different cities and find a new dance class.

[Serenity]

Star child:

It’s really interesting what you say. My abuser hijacked my bucket list too, and tried to prevent me from joining him or even going alone.

(I wonder why they do this?
Is it the feeling of power they get from suppressing us, or is it they think we don’t deserve such things, but they do?!)

[starchild]

Mine just saw everything as a competition … but then you would of though he was the expert in my chosen field of work but could not even get a basic job in the field. how dare I be as good as him if not better lol

He always spoke for me

[Author]

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