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I know everyone on here is at a different stages of recovery and I remember having to limit myself to three things a day to deal with. That could be putting the bin out, showering and opening an email. So I can relate to the effects of abuse. As I went through the system from psychological services, police, courts etc, at almost every stage I was let down. Sometimes by the system and sometimes by individuals. At a time when I was most vulnerable. Part of my recovery was holding these organisations and people who I saw as enabling further abuse to account. Surprisingly this has helped regain my self confidence and self esteem. I’ve visited Parliament and spoken to the Justice Committee. I been in various newspapers. Taken part in government investigations into reforms of the legal aid system. I’ve had new procedures introduced when it comes to vulnerable witnesses in court. Little me. Who was nothing more than a housewife and mother for decades. Who was belittled and told I was nothing, stupid, lazy, b..ch. c..t. Blah Blah. I survived domestic violence and domestic abuse and if I can survive and thrive and make a difference, Every single woman on here can do the same. So no matter where you are in your journey. Know that there is light at the end of the tunnel and we are everything without them. They are nothing without us. Onwards and upwards…. have a good day and remember to do something nice for you. Even if it’s just a bubble bath and give yourself credit for every baby step you take❤️
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Hi Kip,
I love this post, how fantastic it is that you channelled something so awful into creating positive change. Extremely inspiring. I will continue to complain and speak up as I have been doing. If we all speak up and say no to abuse, we can make real changes. Well done Kip and keep going with your good work!
Sunshine xx
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KIP – you’re amazing! <3
I have done similar things to you (though not the same) and it’s so fulfilling isn’t it. Helping to bring about changes so that other women are better supported.
At some point I would hope to be in a position to use my experiences of the crown court system, and of sexual abuse and violence, to bring about change.“Be the change you want to see in the world” <3
Best wishes – LBP. xx
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Hi KIP. I am new to the forum and have recently come out of an emotionally, psychologically and financially abusive relationship. I feel a bit of a fraud in some respects when I read the awful things that other women have had to endure but what I do know is the man I offered a loving home to has slowly and skilfully destroyed my confidence, my self-belief and I have often contemplated suicide. I am certain he has (detail removed by moderator) and he is currently bullying me through the financial courts which is a separate issue, but I am (detail removed by moderator) in debt because he refused to contribute to the daily household running (although did pay rent) and he knows that I don’t earn much but because I managed to get him out of my house (it took 2 months of me being locked in the guest room) he is furious and trying to financially exhaust me. I can’t sleep, I’m not functioning at work and feel like I am going crazy. What I would like to know is how can I stop this man going through life destroying others. I have spoken to his ex-wife who was financially, emotionally and psychologically abused and his ex-girlfriend who also confirms his behaviour was aggressive and threatening. Neither are keen to get involved as they have moved on and one has a high powered job in the legal world. Both of them and their children (x3 of his children with ex and x1 not his with girlfriend) have been profoundly affected by his behaviour. How can this man be allowed to get away with it time and time again. Any advice greatly received. Thanks
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