Child support

[Iwon]

Well had to laugh. My ex reported himself to vs a as he thought he would be able to lie and pay less (Detail removed by moderator)….. considering he wasn’t paying (Detail removed by moderator) seemed pointless.

Anyway they reassessed his claim and told him he had to pay more….. He ignored them and never paid for (Detail removed by moderator) months.

They contacted me today and are enforcing the arrears. They sent us both a letter to say he has to pay a ridiculous amount immediately. (Detail removed by moderator)

Why do these men think the law don’t apply to them???? It just makes me laugh nowadays. We used to starve when I was married as he would gamble all my money…. thank God we have food in the fridge and a nice home now which he has no access to.

I read a great line the other day. Two children are talking to each other and one said ” I am so pleased daddy gets to take it out on mommy for leaving him by taking it out on us kids…… said no kid ever

[MsTaken]

Haha mine did that. Got into massive arrears then got the money deducted from wages coz he wasn’t paying at all. The a few months later he quit his job and went self employed. So he’s back to not paying anything again! My kids are just old enough to start realising what’s going on so they’ll remember this in the future. He’s making his own bed now.

I like that line, I might frame it and send it to him haha

[Iwon]

He has already made his bed with our child. He lives him but don’t like him. He is so controlling. I feel sorry for my child.. but at least he only has to see him for short periods and I thank God don’t have to see his ugly angry face x

[Purple]

When you say enforcing it how are they actually making him pay? I’ve had collect and pay set up for years but he just dodges it by moving jobs before they take any money.
I had the annual review today and read the leaflet about ‘parents that don’t pay’ and it says that the CMS can take it directly from bank accounts or through the courts with a liability order and balifs but im wondering at what point do they actually use those powers? Mine owes over £10,000 in arrears but they don’t seem to do anything about it.

[Iwon]

You have to be assertive and super proactive with dad. At 10 k they can put a charge on his property and force sale. Send bailiffs. My ex us the same but laws have really changed. You have to keep into csa. I agree abusers don’t want to pay because they feel making u suffer financially means they won. Sad little men. Can are actively perusing now. They enforce for you and bring to court very quickly if over 1000 pound now. Get onto them. Be really nice and plead for help.

[Purple]

Yeah I think there is an element of him holding onto control. He used to say if I left he would never see the kids again and I wouldn’t get a penny from him and he has been true to his word! He hasn’t seen the kids for years. And he’s doing his damndest to not part with any money! I wouldn’t care if we were comfortable (financially) but it’s hard making ends meet right now. I will get onto them and see what they say x

[Iwon]

The last ladies comment about he said he would be at see the kids or get a penny….. they really are all the same these abusers. Count your blessings he don’t want to see the kids. My ex pays nothing but rages on about his parental rights and does see our child! In my dreams he disappears as it would be less damaging to our child xxxx

[Purple]

I am absolutely! He caused enough damage to them when living with them so i am counting my blessings for the moment but he still lives close by – almost like he’s taunting me as he has no other ties in the area. I pass him in the car now and again which is such an awful feeling as he glares at me and I’m always concerned he will follow us since he no longer knows where we live. The police have been involved so much I don’t think he would dare now. I feel that he will take his opportunity to worm back in with the kids as they get older which is always a worry but they are most definitely better off without him in their lives, sad thing is he thinks he’s getting at me by not seeing them (by having them he would be allowing me free time to move on, and in his mind see other men etc …) reality is I couldn’t be happier that he has no influence over them. It’s just financially that they are missing out which seems so unfair!

[Iwon]

Believe me him not seeing them is worth a million pound. Think of all the money you will save long-term as kids won’t need therapy xxxx

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