Coercive Control

[HopeLifeJoy]

Hi beautiful’s

A friend of mine sent me a website about Coercive Control which I wish to share with you all.
Although I am now out since few years, I always find it a relief to have this cruel behaviour acknowledged and articulated in clear terms. It kind of helps break the invisible chains, one by one, even if it doesn’t resolve the issue right away with him, it certainly does help feeling understood and validated.

Here an excerpt:
“Then though, she starts to notice that the periods in between the ‘episodes’ are getting smaller or the rules and restrictions he’s imposing upon her are getting tighter. He’ll likely tell her that she is the problem or that she’s imagining it. However, what was once a series of episodes that she might have termed trivial are now starting to form a pattern of behaviour. “

And another excerpt:
“she’s not in a relationship where she is free to exercise that level of autonomy and choice. In what can be described a form of adult-grooming, she’s been coerced into an abusive, controlling relationship of unequal power and now finds herself quite literally captive to her partner’s self-centered, entitled, disordered behaviour.”

And another:
“Control tactics, such as using the legal system to repeatedly drag women through expensive litigation in the Family Court or launching a defamation lawsuit, or smear campaign, in a brazen attempt to silence or discredit their partner’s words, and preserve their own reputation, is rife. Abusers are highly adept at reversing the victim and aggressor roles.”

https://www.coercive-control.com/post-separation.html

Enjoy the information and keep your head held high girls 😘💪

[Rosemary]

Hello hopelifejoy
Thank you for the link I appreciate it . My partner has done this to me as well it’s not very nice .

[Lottieblue]

@HopeLoveJoy
You are so right about finding pieces of writing which clearly express the things we have gone through – either from the perspective of describing the abuser’s behaviour or in terms of the impact that it has on us.

Personally, this is the thing that I have found most helpful since I left. When I start to go crazy with the “why”, the “what if” and the “how did it all go so wrong”, I either seek out the websites or books that I know will set things out clearly again, or I look for more, new evidence and clarity. It always works.

X

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