Viewing 2 reply threads
  • Author
    Posts
    • #85860
      Anonymous
      Inactive

      My son has finished nursery recently and he is ofg to school. I couldn’t stop crying his nursery was a huge support system for me and him and i trusted them with my son. Its been a difficult few years struggling as a single mum. And now i feel as if I have no one even more. It hurt when i picked him up and i saw all the mummy and daddids saying goodbye to each other. I cant help but feel like the single mum in the room everyone avoids. My son going to school has meant ive had to tell them briefly of the abuse and that thankfjlly there is a restraining order. But i feel as if again ive got another task i need to endure. Making sure who has access to my son in school, whether he is safe and not in danger from his dad. Whether the school has taken the information and court paperwork seriously. I feel as if today my paranoia is taking over. I know im having a bad day and my PTSD is wrecking havoc. I just need someone to talk to. My rational side creeps in and i know we havent seen my ex in years but i still can’t help my fear. I am so glad that I never looked back when i left but the fear of him finding us is crippling me again.

    • #85872
      KIP.
      Participant

      Hey, what a superb mum you really are. It’s ok to feel anxiety about change but you are doing a great job at keeping you both safe. Are you in contact with your local women’s aid? They were a fantastic support to me and it might be worth engaging with them. They could come to the school with you to reassure you. I know the feelings of dread and I carried them for five years until I felt I was in control and he wasnt going to ‘finish me off”. You will eventually feel that way too. It’s a process you have to go through. Are you receiving good counselling to support you too? It’s okay to cry too. For too long I was unable to cry, it’s just your emotions working themselves out. Keep going and get some help with your PTSD. I used to catastrophize over the smallest things. If a brown letter arrived I was convinced it was from my ex regarding court. It never was but the irrational fear kept taking over. You know about that rational part. Try some mindfulness when the irrational part kicks in. Look to your left and find something and look at the colour, say a grey kettle. Then look to your right and find a different object different colour. Go back and forth, grey kettle, white fridge. It’s a distraction that works for me. You can do it anywhere too.

    • #85888
      diymum@1
      Participant

      awe hun – i get this and i felt the same i went through this too when my littlest was still at nursery. you feel your the only single parent but your definitely not xx having PTSD is very debilitating. i think taking someone from womens aid with you to see the head teacher at schools is a really good idea. i have afterschool club aware off the situation. schools have good child protection policies so maybe womens aid could pick out what they need to protect you guys xx i admire single mums so much and so do lots off other descent people xxxx much love diymum

Viewing 2 reply threads
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.

© 2024 Women's Aid Federation of England – Women’s Aid is a company limited by guarantee registered in England No: 3171880.

Women’s Aid is a registered charity in England No. 1054154

Terms & conditionsPrivacy & cookie policySite mapProtect yourself onlineMedia │ JobsAccessibility Guide

Log in with your credentials

or    

Forgot your details?

Create Account

Skip to content