Difficult choices

[Rainbowdream]

So I have my booking in appointment with the midwife soon. I’m worried as I know some of the questions will involve our relationship. I really struggle lying in any way due to anxiety issues. but I’m also really scared about saying anything that means she may suspect somethings going on. I don’t know what will happen if I tell her. The fact that this baby, no matter how happy I am to be carrying, possibly wasn’t conceived consentually. That my relationship at best is not functioning well.

I’m just scared, confused and don’t know what to do for the best for my children.

[Lisa]

Hi Rainbowdream,

Perhaps see how you feel during the appointment and if you feel able to share at that point? If you did feel able to tell your midwife they would be more informed to be able to support you during your pregnancy. It is your choice how much or how little you share.

If you haven’t done so already, you can use our Live Chat service to talk this through in confidence with a Women’s Aid support worker, they won’t tell you what to do, but can discuss your situation and signpost you to other support that’s relevant for you.

Keep posting,

Lisa

[Rainbowdream]

Yeah I guess thankyou, I have discussed with friends and the are both pushing me to be honest. They think it could be the perfect opportunity to speak up.
It all just feels very scary though.

I don’t see how ìt would impact the care I would receive as I and my toddler are not at risk of physical harm.
If I was to accept that there is sexual violence though, then I have been told that can escalate to physical violence, which makes me nervous.

I guess I am conflicted and unsure what’s the best thing to do.
Thankyou for taking the time to respond

[Author]

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