17th June 2016 at 12:32 am #19352AyannaParticipant
When I left I took my things with me. Among them were the plates and cups and cutlery that we used together, but which I had bought several years before I had met him.
I quickly changed the cutlery, as I found it impossible to use it after I left.
The dinner set was a more complicated issue as it had been expensive and I did not want to give it away for this reason.
However, I found eating from these plates problematic. I felt very uncomfortable.
The situation became unbearable and a few days ago I decided all of a sudden to buy a new dinner set. I have no money for such escapades at the moment, but I could not go on like this any more.
I brought the dinner set from which he had eaten to a charity shop.
I feel so relieved not so see these plates and cups anymore in the kitchen cupboard, but instead a new and innocent dinner set that has nothing to do with my past.
It was worth spending that money.
17th June 2016 at 10:45 am #19368HerindoorsParticipant
Hi Ayanna. I understand this. I have very slowly been replacing the furniture because it was the furniture I sat on while he shouted at me, the table he banged his fist on etc… I want to look at it and not have those memories and I want to look at it and know I chose it without an argument about the style, colour, cost etc…
Just this morning I took two bags of old clothes to a charity shop, just as I was leaving I remembered something and put my wedding outfit in one of the bags as well (not a wedding dress, a cheap outfit, because he was cheap). Feels great! I am not sure why I didn’t do it before, I have donated to that charity shop a few times since we split up – but there you go. Its gone now 🙂
17th June 2016 at 11:59 pm #19453AyannaParticipant
In a way I was lucky that I had to buy most furniture again.
I also got rid of a lot of clothes. And I changed my underwear. That was so important for me 🙂
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