- This topic has 5 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 8 years, 9 months ago by Nor82.
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18th January 2016 at 7:50 pm #7960Sparkle1Participant
Well I packed up everything that was left here of his sbd dropped it round to his sisters as I was leaving she said “he’s accepted it he’s at that point where he is ready to cut you off now so if there is any part of you that wants him back and to go to marriage counselling then you need to act soon because I would want you to see him change his ways and give another girl the good life that you deserved” it felt like a kick in the teeth I came away feeling hurt and angry and doubting my decision all the “what ifs” creeped back in I don’t want to feel like this I don’t believe that he can change or even if he could it would never be enough to have a normal life! Feeling frustrated tonight 🙁
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19th January 2016 at 11:07 pm #8014SilkyHalideParticipant
I Really relate to this Sparkle1
My ex said this sort of thing direct to me last night. (Not the first time but said like this will be the last time)
I didn’t have doubt then but I’ve read something today that has made me doubt again. I think it’s only a little wobble but it shakes you doesn’t it?I’ve thought about if he gives someone a better life, and it’s a risk worth taking as the risk of going back and things not changing is far greater to me.
If I find myself and love myself I will be happy for me whatever he moves on to.
I dont want to be or feel responsible for his wellbeing either way.
Hope your what ifs go soon.
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19th January 2016 at 11:18 pm #8015Confused123Participant
Hey Hun
Don’t listen to them , u have seen how well he treated u , fact is he can’t and doesn’t respect u, that’s what is important , maybe he will treat next one better who knows , but if he can’t treat u right that’s what matter, u deserve better , hard as it is let him go, living with abuser breaks u silently
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20th January 2016 at 4:31 pm #8041HopespringsParticipant
Echo what both ladies say. He won’t change and he’s got his sister to say that to you either consciously or subconsciously so you do doubt yourself but listen to your gut because it’s right. Big hugs stay strong xx
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20th January 2016 at 5:11 pm #8043Sparkle1Participant
Thanks I’m really trying to not let any of it get to and every day I’m away from him it’s hitting me how Disfunctional our relationship was I spent all my time trying to keep him happy and forgot myself no one should make you feel so low and isolated I’m more angry now that I put up with it for so long and kept going back for more x
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20th January 2016 at 9:44 pm #8057Nor82Participant
Angry is a good place to be its better than crying! Keep going and stay strong the only thing that is getting me through my ordeal is the bad things he did, yes there maybe be times where I think I miss him or was it my fault but he wasn’t the person he portrayed to be his not the man I fell in love with it took 18 months for him to show his true colours! So every time I’m having a moment I read my ten page statement that granted my injunction just to remind me of how evil he was keep going! X
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