Emotional abuse or just they speak their minds?

[Karisqq]

Getting so grumpy whenever talking to my parents, every time they just make me don’t feel good or confident about myself even tho I know my own worth and I have succeeded in multiple areas. They always leave me doubting myself and feeling that I’m not sufficient or I’,m a bad daughter. They just can’t accept the fact that I have decided to live aboard that they kept blackmailing me even I tried to express that I care about the family. They would say sth like ‘well we’re not going to see each other much and you’ll regret if one day we die’ or ‘no use even you care about the family, since you decided to be away anyway’. Also, they disrespect my field, I wanna be an academic and support gender-based violence survivors and advocate for them, so I study feminism, while they say I’m not being a ‘normal person’, and they even say I’m being aggressive and revolutionary. After all, they just want me to go back to them and be who they want me to be. That “normal person’! But it isn’t their first time to say that I’m weird, in fact since I was a kid.When I talked about my traumas caused by them, they would just get defensive, saying that I’m not grateful for what they do, and saying that I’m the one who chose to only hold on the sad things in live. They just don’t admit the harm and things that from what they see it isn’t so bad, but I remember I don’t rely on their emotional support since the age of 7. After all these manipulations, from time to time I just worry that whether I am really able to make a living on my own, and stand for the isolation and difficulties away from family.

[Lisa]

Hi Karisqq,

Welcome to the forum and thank you for sharing with us. I hope you find the forum a safe and supportive place to be with others who understand.

If you feel like you are in need of some additional support, you could chat to a Women’s Aid worker in confidence via our Live Chat service (open every day). They won’t tell you what to do, but can discuss your situation and signpost you to other support that’s relevant for you. You can access the chat service here:
https://chat.womensaid.org.uk/

Do keep posting to let us know how you’re getting on.

Best wishes,

Lisa
Forum Moderator

[Author]

Posts