Family therapy

[Chocolatebunnie]

Hi all, thoughts on family therapy.

This is potentially on my own as nobody else wants to go.

Sounds silly but it’s with (detail removed by moderator) my child is under the psychiatrist there as was my elder child who is now with adult mental health.

Kids met family therapist before with dad.

Dad decided we didn’t need help so discharged.

This is (detail removed by moderator) referral by same psychiatrist who is obviously hearing our family need change, help, support?

I thinking of going alone but not sure. I want to show willing to help my kids.

Thing is therapist was quite hard in her manner plus sided with my hubby their dad, at the time.

I’m ok at the moment as things are relatively calm here. However, I know there’s a cycle and I will want to talk once we hit the bad times again.

I’m just not sure she’s the right person for help, both my kids mental health is fragile and I’m coping but could do with a space of my own.

Plus do I tell husband or say I’m going but for myself and to support the kids more?

Any ideas or experience of your own I would be grateful to hear x

[Lisa]

Hi Chocolatebunnie

It sounds like a difficult decision but it’s really clear that you are just trying to do what’s best for your children. Your safety is so important, it is concerning that your husband may try to get involved again and this could put you at risk.

I wonder if you could ask for a different therapist if you are not comfortable, or maybe speak to the local domestic abuse service who sometimes offer counselling or support for children/young people, they have a good understanding about domestic abuse. You can find their details here: https://www.womensaid.org.uk/womens-aid-directory/

Take care and keep posting

Lisa

[Twisted Sister]

Hi Chocolatebunnie

Sorry to hear that this is not working out for you, after everything you’ve already suffered. You have expressed concerns about this therapist, and for that reason alone they are not a good fit for you. There are others out there,but any therapy you and your children have should not include an abuser, as the abuser can bring more damaging psychological abuse to you all through therapy. If he wants therapy thats good, but he’ll need to do it alone as this will not be an environment suitable to yourself or your children.

Can you go back to your GP for some other recommendations that you could check into?

Well done for looking into this for you all.

warmest wishes

ts

[Chocolatebunnie]

Thank you for your replies, I discussed this with my DV support worker and decided to give it a go, I will take each session one at a time.

The therapist did appear to be on my husband side however before closing her case with us last time did as if i was holding back and not being entirely open, i didnt feel comfortable talking to her then but maybe I misread her as it was over the phone. I can only find out by trying again but as i say with a view to not continuing if things are not comfortable.

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