- This topic has 4 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 4 years, 8 months ago by Tobfree.
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6th July 2019 at 1:38 am #82492TobfreeParticipant
Feel so beaten down from the mind games guilt trips and manipulation are exhausting and draining and he sucks u back with all these mind games and the more u try to get out if the cycle of it all
And the more u try to escape
the more mind games manipulation guilt trips gas lighting and trauma bonding is thrown at u
All ways u at fault and to blame
He Never takes responsibility for his mistreatment of uI had all kinds of emotional n mental abuse threw at me today it is getting worse the more i try to escape
I am still trying to get out and i am just taking one day at a time -
6th July 2019 at 8:46 pm #82587LisaMain Moderator
Hi Tobfree
He has probably noticed that you are pulling away from him even if it is in small ways, and so he is escalating his abuse to try to get full control back. The last thing he wants is for you to be independent, he is trying to keep you feeling down so you are easier to control. This is not right and you are doing the best thing by trying to escape his control in whatever ways you can.
Stay strong you can do thisTake care and keep posting
Lisa
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8th July 2019 at 8:29 pm #82880ScrewedOverBigtimeParticipant
TOBFREE
I too am going through what you are going through and to make matters worse I finally snapped (detail removed by moderator) and abused my ex and his new gf by text,I’m now angry at myself as I’ve worked hard for months to not do this. Unfortunately me and alcohol dont mix…he has smeared my name to everyone and we live in a town where everyone knows everyone and hes decided to get with a former friend (detail removed by moderator) so he can basically watch my every move I feel noone gets it and feel I’m losing my mind you are not alone I know its his s**t not mine but always get those moments of doubt because of his messed up mind games. Sending live and thought stay strong x-
8th July 2019 at 8:33 pm #82882ScrewedOverBigtimeParticipant
TOBFREE Sorry I need to add I eventually managed to leave but he still managed to continue the abuse (detail removed by moderator) years later because we have a child together….I may of well been with him the last (detail removed by moderator) years cos somehow I still managed to let him continue his abuse until now!!!!
One thing he always used and still tries to is fear …not necessarily of him physically hurting you but the damage they do mentally emotionally while making put there the victim and were the crazy ones…x
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10th July 2019 at 12:01 pm #83012TobfreeParticipant
Hi ladies thanks for your advise and support and for sharing
Its so hard trying to stand in your own power
When so much confusion over him with mind games being playedAs he can be mr nice so loving so supportive and as i have disabilities i do need support
He can even go the extra mile doing things that are sweet and kindThen if he feels i have deliberately done something which has upset him or said some thing
that upsets himBoom its like a mine going off he will with-hold affection yet give enough to keep u hanging on
And he will barely speak or text u etcAnd then u know its coming the explosion of words vindictive actions the guilt trips n he does say stuff to make me feel so scared yet will also tell u this is normal too
And he will do guilt trips towards me and make me feel confused and do much more mind games
where i am more confused i sometimes doubt my self and sometimesAnd feel sorry for him which is hardly surprising with all the guilt trips and mind games threw at me
sometimes i feel like i at rock bottomAnd this is not love
If it was not for the amazing ladies on here like ur selfs
and cos i been through WA and done freedom programme and got advise support via my councellorI would of totally believed that it is all my fault and
i am just reacting cos of past abuse nothing to do with the sxxt he doing to me
And i would of believed it is all my fault i caused his upset i upset him etc etc
Thank god i don’t
Yet it still hardI just trying to take one day at a time
N try to not think about him trying to work what is going on with him outMr nice use to be more visible yet now he more mr nasty mind games
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