Hi there, you’re not alone. Please reach out to Women’s Aid directly as they will be able to offer you advice and support.
I left and went back several times. It would be good for a bit but then it went straight back to the abuse. Every time I went back the ‘good times’ lasted less and less time and the abuse worsened.
It’s fantastic to hear your abuser does not know where you are, it’s best if it’s kept that way.
I’m wondering if you ever did any counselling or therapy or educated yourself in the dynamics of abuse? If not, now would be the prime opportunity to do so or do some more. I’ve found that this is the path which has stopped me from going back to my abuser and also prevented me from going into another abusive relationship with another abuser.
What do you know or understand about abuse?
Keep posting x