- This topic has 9 replies, 7 voices, and was last updated 5 years, 7 months ago by Lisa.
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23rd August 2018 at 1:26 pm #63078AyannaParticipant
This summer has been the best since I fled.
My landlord has improved the safety of my home and I felt so encouraged that I did a lot of decorating in the garden.
This has improved the atmosphere in my home so much.
I still lock myself in on most days, but I do not feel this extreme anxiety anymore.
I do this mainly now, because my brain is very noisy and I need peace and quiet.
The last anniversary, the second attempt when he probably tried to kill me, passed and I did not get all worked up.
My self confidence at work has improved too.
The progress is slow and in little steps, but compared to how I started I can see a steep curve into the right direction.
Recovery can be a slow process, but it definitely happens.
I hope this helps someone. -
23rd August 2018 at 3:28 pm #63083Twisted SisterParticipant
Can i be the first to congratulate you on how far you have come Ayanna! Its amazing to hear your progress, and that you notice how far you have come too, that you manage to work throughout this awful time.
I does inspire some hope to hear this, definitely, especially at times (too often) when i lose hope as our journey has been so marked with homelessness and lack of support and further abuse since leaving, and I certainly don’t seem to be improving much with time.
Its a very kind post, warmest wishes ts
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23rd August 2018 at 8:52 pm #63090lover of no contactParticipant
Hi Ayanna,
That is so good to hear because I know you have been through the mil and have been on the rollercoaster of recovery. Its great to hear there is light at the end of the tunnel. If we just keep going, just keep taking the small actions of self-care and/or actions to get away from abuser.
Keep posting your thoughts and feelings for your stage of recovery. It really is very helpful and hopeful.
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23rd August 2018 at 9:38 pm #63092LisaMain Moderator
Hello Ayanna,
What a lovely post to read. Its so great to hear that you are feeling stronger. You are such a support to everyone on the forum and I am happy for you.
Best wishes,
Lisa
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24th August 2018 at 10:25 am #63112AyannaParticipant
Thank you all so much for your replies!
It means a lot to me.Twisted Sister, you will get there.
I was not supported and had to fight so hard for what I got.
It made me bitter and angry.
At some point things become easier and trouble does not happen often anymore.
It is just a matter of time.
The longer you are out the more you find pieces of yourself again and start puzzling them together.
After a few years of feeling completely broken I gained back some self confidence and it keeps growing.
Other, more positive life events will begin to happen, which lead you into a different direction and distract you increasingly from the past.
It is a slow process however. -
24th August 2018 at 10:35 pm #63129White RoseParticipant
That’s so lovely.
I needed cheering up today and you’ve made me smile. The feeling has been a long time coming for you, breathe in it’s goodness and enjoy the beauty of your garden x*x -
25th August 2018 at 1:06 am #63135banksParticipant
Hi Ayanna,
this is so amazing to read. Well done on making progress at work and getting your confidence back and I bet your garden looks beautiful. Thank you for reminding me to keep going and keep hoping for better days,
Banks xx
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25th August 2018 at 11:42 am #63148Twisted SisterParticipant
to Lisa
sorry to put a post here that might deviate from the post itself, but just a little note to Lisa as I am not receiving any notifications and without them struggle to find the posts i havecontributed to, so before I get lost again, had to just put something here where i did find a reply to my post and had no notification of it?
Perhaps you could message me direct to let me know whats gone a bit wrong please?
many thanks
TS
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25th August 2018 at 4:11 pm #63156Eve1Participant
Ayanna, it’s great to read this positive post from you. I remember you’ve had such a long hard road to travel. I’m so happy you are feeling positive. You’ve done amazingly well.
Hugs to you
Love
Eve
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