26th January 2016 at 8:28 pm #8390MoonParticipant
I thought I was doing really well but I’m so so scared 😢
I’m returning to area tomorrow to attend my foster dads funeral and yesterday my partner was harassing me to have our little girl tomorrow (I didn’t tell when funeral was , he has found out ) and wanted to say goodnight to her etc.
Today I’ve heard nothing !!
No tx no calls just gone quite, hasn’t even mentioned about having our daughter tomorrow!!
He used to digest information after our meetings and then a few days later I would proper ‘get it’
I’m so scared this is what he is doing and is going to get me tomorrow !!
At least if he had our little girl- I would be safe 😀
I’ve just got a feeling he is closing in on is and he defiantly knows where I will be tomorrow and if he feels now he has nothing to lose he may carry out all those previous threats 😢
26th January 2016 at 8:44 pm #8391Falling SkysParticipant
Deep breath, sorry that you won’t be able to just greave tomorrow for your step dad.
He has everything to loose, his freedom for a start.
Do you have a non mol order on him? Then ring the police if he comes near you. Zero tolerance.
I make plans in my head what I’d do if my abuser trys something, that why if I panic I will go on auto pilot and survive.
You are doing so well, keep it up
26th January 2016 at 9:17 pm #8395MoonParticipant
Thank you for your reply.
Just feel that I don’t know what his nx move is, as it’s so strange he hasn’t asked what the plans are to have our little girl etc!
I haven’t got any orders in place yet was trying to find out info.
Hope he has enough respect not to turn up tomor but what do I do if he does and sits with me – I’m certainly not going to make a fuss and no one knows the situation, he will just be able to intimidate me !
My main fear is that he will get me after or at some point before I can return to safety – just feel that I have done so much and don’t want to end up becoming a statistic 😢😢
27th January 2016 at 12:41 am #8415AyannaParticipant
You need to ring 101 and speak to the police about your fears. Also, switch the GPS on your phone on, always keep your phone ready to dial 999 and if you cannot talk the police can trace your call. Speak to several people at the event. Let them know what is going on and that your life is in danger. Keeping quiet about this is a mistake. Get someone to always be with you, to accompany you until you are safe. If he comes close to you scream for help. Forget being ashamed and all that nonsense. Do not care what people think. Your life is more important than anything else.
27th January 2016 at 6:42 am #8420Falling SkysParticipant
The police were a great help to me as was the doctors, woman aid, rape crisis.
You must tell people what you have been through. Abusers power is our silence. It’s not easy to speak out but they will help you through the tears I regret the years I kept my mask of normality on.
27th January 2016 at 3:45 pm #8463LittleBritishPhoenixParticipant
I agree with the ladies above hun…our silence protects them, it doesn’t protect us.
I’d ring 101 and talk your fears through with them, they may be able to put a ‘flag’ on your number/location so if you needed to call 999 then they’re with you rather quickly.
Also, they may be able to provide a sort of protection detail – I once had a plain-clothes officer pick me up from the train station, take me to my location, and then stayed outside before taking me back to the train station.
And definitely stay with someone at all times, it doesn’t have to be someone huge and burly to protect you, just having someone there would hopefully be deterrent enough so that if he did turn up, he might think twice about kicking off or attempting to intimidate you. And also, even if something does happen, you have a witness to it.
I think it’s a good idea to make a safety plan so that you know exactly what to do and where to go if something happens or if you feel in danger.
Please let us know how you get on Moon. xx
27th January 2016 at 9:26 pm #8490MarthamooParticipant
I’m not sure if you are getting outreach support but if so, could someone accompany you to the funeral? I agree with everything that the ladies have put above. Your safety is the most important thing and do what ever you can to protect yourself. Take care and let us know how thins go xx
27th January 2016 at 10:13 pm #8492Winterblues2Participant
was thinking about you today. Hope you were able to greive in peace xx
28th January 2016 at 7:48 am #8499InneedofsomepeaceParticipant
Hope all went ok and he didn’t cause a problem.
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