Finally reaching out..

[LozzyX]

Hi

This is my first post. The wait to be approved felt like forever as did waiting for the call back from women’s aid yesterday… But so grateful they called back.

My relationship with my husband has basically broken down now and I think it’s beyond any sort of reconciliation… Issues with financial and emotional abuse and has all sprialled this year with my husband developing a cocaine addiction

So yes never thought in a million years I’d ever be in this position nor see my husband acting the way he is now.

But I am hoping day by day I will get stronger and reach a point where I am mentally strong enough, and safe, to leave.

[Raincloud]

Sending big hugs to you, my ex partner also has developed a Cocaine addiction. I can relate to living with an addict.

I hope you get mentally and physically stronger. We are all here to support you if you need to talk. I am also new to the forum.

x

[freedomtochoose]

Hello there and welcome. Well done for taking these first few steps.
Hopefully the first of many on the road to a better life, eh?
More power to your elbow
all best
ftc
x

[LozzyX]

Thank you both for welcoming me .. I think it’s going to be a long painful road …

It’s such a roller coaster of emotions … Feel sorry for him as addiction is a disease , then next I am angry for all the lies and manipulation – and that’s the bit I struggle with most… Is he a ‘serial manipulator’ as the woman’s aid lady I spoke to described him , due to the addiction or is it completely ingrained in him and led him to become addicted. I do believe he was really suffering after losing his dad and stress with work , toxic relationship with his mum… So I know he is using drugs to cope…. But sometimes especially more so now, he will be really cruel just for sake of it I think 🙁

[Lisa]

Hi Lozzyx

Welcome to the forum and well done for reaching out here and speaking to the helpline i know that can be a big step.

There is lots of support out there to help you get to a point where you feel stronger, you can contact your local DV support service to see what help they offer, you can find details here https://www.womensaid.org.uk/domestic-abuse-directory/

You could also look into the Freedom programme https://freedomprogramme.co.uk/

I hope you find this forum a supportive place to share how you are feeling.

Take care and keep posting

Lisa

[KIP.]

Hi and welcome. Please don’t blame his stress or cocaine addiction or anything else for his abusive behaviour. Many men have stresses in their life but they do not take it out on their partner. There is never an excuse for domestic abuse x he chooses to behave this way towards you. It’s unacceptable behaviour. I’m guessing he does it when there are no witnesses? So he can control himself when he needs to?

[LozzyX]

Yes he does know how to control /switch his behaviour. He can be like if to just me and his mum in private.

The other night I secretly recorded him.. I wanted evidence in case my friends and family don’t believe me when it all comes out … As he is ever so nice and loveable in front of them. It’s important my family believe me as they will be hopefully be my support network for when I leave but it’s horrid when I just know they will have doubts , they already think I am an over worrier/reacter etc so they will think it’s me being silly…oh well I guess what’s important is my own wellbeing and sanity.

[Iwantmeback]

Hi LozzyX and welcome to the clan, as someone said to me.i accidentally recorded my husband honestly didnt know id done it. Boy the aggression was off the scale. Take care big hugs to you.
IwM B 💕💕

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