First big step

[Lightning-Jet]

I have taken the 1st step & I have finally spoken to local support.
It took a while to pluck up the courage, but I’ve done it.
I will now have one2one support to get me through this!

[Lisa]

Hi Lightening-Jet,

This is really positive news! We understand how hard it is to take that first step. Having one-to-one support can be so valuable, wishing you well with the next steps.

Kind Regards,

Lisa

[Lightning-Jet]

Hi Lisa,

It really is, it took me so long staring at the number & not daring to dial it.
I was on the phone for nearly an hour, the person I spoke to was lovely and it’s comforting to know I will have a go-tp person for support in getting a plan in place, but also to support me emotionally as well.

I have just got to wait for my support worker to call me to make my appointment.

I have stupidly felt guilty for going behind his back to get things arranged, but I don’t know why that would be considering the amount of abuse I have gone through.

Hopefully I’ll get my call really soon!

Thanks Lisa
L-J

[Lisa]

Hi Lightning-Jet,

The guilt you feel is because you are an honest person, so it feels wrong to have to ‘go behind his back’; however, you of course have to do this for your safety. Also, it may be because you have been somewhat conditioned to feel this way by him, over time. You have nothing to feel guilty about, he has caused this. You are doing what you need to do to move forward and to look after yourself.

Kind Regards,

Lisa

[ILoveMusic]

Hi Lightningjet,

Oh I understand that guilt only too well!! Crazy isn’t it – when you think what they are doing to us and we still feel ‘bad’ about doing something to save ourselves. Every time I fill in a form or talk to a person on the phone and talk about what he’s putting me through I am filled with a sense of betrayal. Their damage runs deep – I feel almost brain washed by him…thinking or doing for myself goes against the rules of the Guru person – just like a Cult!!

Well done you on making that first step!! It’s massive and empowering! :-)))

[Lightning-Jet]

Hi ILoveMusic, oh yes as much as we shouldn’t feel guilt, we do. It is crazy, but it is because we are nice people. Yep I completely understand and I feel the same each time I speak to anyone.
You are exactly right, the damage really does run deep. They systematically grind us down until we are living our lives the way they want us to. It really is jus like a cult.
Thank you, I am proud that I have finally done it. I know I am doing the right thing, I can’t wait to have my life back!

[White Rose]

Well done! I cried with relief when I made my call as for me it meant I acknowledged the abuse. My support worker was amazing. I have really fond memories of her gentle but firm chats about believing in myself, keeping no contact and really empowering me to be strong.
It was tough when we had to say good bye but I knew she was going on to help someone else who needed her more than I did. She phoned me a couple of times after to check up on me too which I know is normal but she’d remembered things I struggled with and reminded me of my coping strategies.
Don’t feel guilty or scared – you’ll be fine just take things a day at a time x

[Lightning-Jet]

Hi White Rose,

Thank you! I completely understand that, I shed a few tears myself. The relief I felt at finally opening up and knowing I will have the support there to help me through it. One of the biggest steps is acknowledging the abuse. It is so easy to just let things be as they are. I admit I have done that for a long time just for the quiet life.
I can’t wait to speak to my support worker, I am waiting for that call!
That is fantastic, I am so pleased to hear your support worker was amazing! I hope to use my experiences one day to help others once I have my life back on track.
Thank you, I really appreciate that 🙂 x

[Author]

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