Help.

[Happiermex]

Hi to who ever is taking the time to read this, I am a few months out and all is quiet he’s moved on and Iv dealt with it. But my anxiety and emotions are so strong and I don’t know why! I don’t picture him in my head when I’m feeling this way and I have seen pics of him on social media and it dosnt make me feel any kind of way but my god I feel like I’m clinging on to something? I’m not sure that makes sense but I still feel the cloud is hanging over me. I still cry now and then and like I have said the anxiety some days is a lot. Other days are good but I feel very damaged by the physical and mental abuse, he has reached out not so long ago for things he wanted from my home and tried to be friendly but I cut him short and said we are both with new people please do t message it’s disrespectful, and suggested his mum messaged for the stuff which never happened.
I don’t think lock down is helping I have a child but feel so alone I go to work come home sort my child myself and go to bed. I’m really trying to dig deep to over come these emotions because I am survivor and I am lucky with what I have. I hope everyone’s doing g ok in these horrible times I’m always avalible for a chat, I will always help where I can.

[KIP.]

Hi, have you had counselling. It sounds very much like trauma and contact with him will be very triggering for you. Contact from an abuser is toxic. That way they try to act like they’ve done nothing wrong, send us spinning. The Body Keeps The Score is a good book about trauma. What you’re feeling is normal after an abusive relationship. I’d get some good therapy. Talk to your GP about it. I have PTSD and the feeling of anxiety are there even when I’m not thinking of him, it’s my body remembering the feelings that came with the abuse but my mind hasn’t processed that abuse yet. That’s where counselling will help x lockdown also brought back memories for me and feelings of helplessness and depression. I’ve heard that if you’ve previously had mental health issues then lockdown has been bringing up those feelings.

[Happiermex]

I think I will contact my gp, because my mind has blocked out a lot. I can talk about it but it doesn’t feel like my story I’m telling if that makes sense? I just want it to be over it’s so cruel. He’s blocked on everything but emailed me so now every time I get a email my heart goes and I feel sick.
There’s a lot of emotions running through me, some days I’m ok then others I go back to that horrible anxiety feeling.

[KIP.]

Block his email address or change yours. It will give you a break from that trigger. Yes, they are toxic so zero contact is how you start to recover. Take back control. Tell him not to contact you again or you will report him to the police, if you have children then use a third party for all contact x

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