I am sorry to hear that you are having a difficult time today, it is understandable that it will bring up some bad memories for you.
As you can see, we are still having some technical issues with the forum with many users finding it difficult to post. Hopefully these issues will be dealt with really soon and you will get lots of support.
In the meantime, do remember if you need to talk things through you can call the helpline at anytime.
Best wishes
Lisa