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another sleepless night. i (detail removed by moderator) at work. this is ALWAYS when the head games start. i have no fight left. he has gone never coming back. but im burnt out. exhausted. cant and dont want to face anyone. i want to go home walk past all the botched jobs i an going to have to find the money for someone to fix curl up in bed go asleep and never wake back up. 20yrars of abuse by 3 exs i cant take anymore. i done nothing but love these men and only have a broken heart and soul to show for it. i really have had enough
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You poor thing, you sound completely exhausted. Maybe you should just get into bed and rest for a few days – if you can. It sounds like you need it. It’s ok to shut the world out for a while. Get some nice food in and bunker down. Bathe and sleep and eat well and take good care of yourself. It won’t solve everything, but you might emerge a few days later feeling a bit stronger.
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i wish I could eat. not had a bite since last Saturday in completely numb drained exhausted lost the will to live..
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Try going in to the supermarket and finding something that appeals to you to eat. Even if it’s just fruit or a smoothie. Or a treat like your favourite chocolate. Or something weird like pringles with nutella. Give yourself permission to eat anything you like. I shopped daily after I left my abuser because it was hard to make myself eat. I found it easier if I had just chosen whatever I had for dinner rather forcing myself to eat whatever was in the house. I fluctuated wildly between eating really healthy food like salads and baked fish, and eating nothing but pints of ice cream. But I survived. And that’s the important thing.
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i wish i could as soo much as soon as i have a drink im in the bathroom its awful. hes still killing me
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Hey ISS, do what you’ve got to do to get through it, somtimes this is going to bed for a long time, exhaustion is horrid for sure, for me it really was about surrending to it for a while, I slept and slept and slept whenever I could. Slowly you will come out the otherside and start to feel there are windows of time when you can do some things, feel more able to look after yourself again and pick a few things up. Stuff the jobs for now, let that go, looking round at what needs doing will only depress you further, doesnt matter, not important, these things will get done at some point but now is not that time. You will get through this and rise again for sure, but for now sleep if that’s what your body needs x
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thank you fizzylem
today has been horrid. i have done a few posts today. my friend has stayed with me. your right about the jobs i nolonger care. its me time from now on. police are coming tomorrow to put an end to the harassment. my number has been changed now i feel free.. im si lucky there is no kids involved -
Great, sounds like you’ve found a bit of fight and are focusing on you, and you’ve pulled in some support. Hope the police can help. Going no contact really is the only option – put him out. I tried keeping the line of comms open for a while, because of our child’s arranegments, doesnt work, only gives him somewhere to voice his angry delusions – keep it going – and the abuse continues. Stand firm. We’re here whenever you need us x
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nobody will ever do this to me again. it would see me off
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they didn’t turn up hun im absolutely fumin they was supposed to be here at 2pm. x feel like im 1step forward 4 back
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no nothing im livid…. everytime i get up i get knocked back down again. but i will get back up im determined he wont beat me down no more
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Hi Imsosad,
I remember going through burnout, more than once. I found for me being in nature really helped. Sitting in the balcony, walking in a park, or along a waterway. Even if you can travel for a few days not for a holiday but self care and rebuild your strength. Fresh air frequently, even in all weathers. It helped me. I hope you find what works for you.
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hi goggleeyes
i am much better i take one day at a time. i do a lot of walking this does clear my head. i have worked flat out which has exhausted me but helped keep my mind occupied. each day is now getting easier no contact is the greatest cure. i still have very much up and down days but i have given myself something to lookforward too which helps. i hope you are keeping well.. x
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