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I stopped inviting my ex to family things a few years ago. He used to sit about like a bad smell expecting to be waited on. His first family told him they felt lighter when he was away working. He never worked nearly as much during our relationship so I didn’t get it. It’s weird feeling jumpy. I’m sure there’s more which will come out in the wash. I like it when my friends meet each other and my friends like the new man. One of my friends saw my ex sitting alone at a concert. They said he looked sad. All of this stuff he has brought directly on himself. It was awful being attacked by my daughter and being blamed for it. It honestly felt like an attack by proxy. It was horrible being woken up again and again and again by him feeling like a sex toy. I cannot remember the amount of times I told him, only to be told that I was wrong and that it was his way of showing affection. I couldn’t work it out why I didn’t like it. My ex assumed consent because I was there. I was his wife. I have no idea what the police asked him, if he just denied everything or did a no comment interview.
I have a house full of dogs and I work hard with behavioural problems that crop up. Since he left the dogs have become so much calmer and there is far less nipping and visitors are feeling safer. It is harder with the children as they still see their dad and some of the stuff that comes out of them is horrid.
The new man suspects that my ex is worse than I know. I don’t think he is although some of the things he has said have made me very uncomfortable.
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Ex has told me that the dogs are ‘our’ dogs. I don’t agree. He chose to move to a place which doesn’t allow dogs. He also doesn’t pay maintenance for them. He pays nothing towards his own children either. Then he rails at me for being angry. I feel pity for him. However, all that has happened is of his own making.
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