I bottled it ! 😥

[PhoenixBlue]

So I’m feeling like I can’t go on anymore, I told him this after he spent the night in (detail removed by Moderator) to drink as i won’t let him drink at home. He slept on (detail removed by Moderator) and came home the next morning looking awful and hung over.

I don’t like him drinking at home as it makes him worse.

It didn’t go well, he’s saying he will change bla bla

It’s just having the strength to end my marriage, it’s a bug thing, especially as I still love him. I just don’t think he can change, otherwise he would of done by now.

[Falling Skys]

Hi PB

Big big hugs.

If you can ring Womans Aid and take to someone, its so hard to get away. They have played with your head so we be-leave we can’t cope without them, when in reality we can and are a lot better off.

I gave my abusers more changes than the “Last Chance Saloon”. I made excuses, I couldn’t afford to be on my own with the children, I didn’t know how to do repairs around the house, it was my fault I made him angry, he had problems with his family/work/health.

Keep verbalising what he’s doing you will get the strength and we will all support you through it.

FS xx

[PhoenixBlue]

Thank you. I know I can’t go on, I also know it’s gonna take me a little while to finally ask him to go.

I know he can’t change, I know I’m going to miss him.

I worry for my daughter…she’s young and I know he will try and turn her against me.

I will also lose my stepson, and it’s ripping apart the family we created. I know I’m not perfect either.

Just a little more time x

[KIP.]

In my experience he’s going nowhere. It’s not the alcohol that makes him worse. It’s him. Mostbpeople drink and are not abusive. I blamed the alcohol for years and did what you’re doing. Tried to stop him drinking. It’s actually backfires as you think he’s being good and behaving himself and listening to you and you feel grateful for him not drinking around you. It’s all his fault that you have to behave this way. It’s dysfunctional and how comes he comes out looking like the reasonable one!

[PhoenixBlue]

It’s just my daughter I worry for.

I thought I could just manage his behaviour and I’d be ok. But in reality I can’t and it doesn’t stop the kids seeing it. Everything is tarnished, even the good times and I can’t go another year with a birthday being spoilt by his mood or behaviour.

X

[KIP.]

We all worry for our children but believe me it’s better to come from a broken home than an abusive one. In any other relationship if you’re unhappy, you end it. I thought I loved my husband but I was trauma bonded to him. When you take out the emotional blackmail, the threats, the bullying tactics, the fear of his retribution, I would have left him years ago and wish I had. My son learned abusive behaviour from his dad and thinks it’s normal. So the cycle goes on and I’m trying to get some respect back X

[PhoenixBlue]

Thank you x

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