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    • #134530
      nbumblebee
      Participant

      I wanted to post in this the positive section. I knkw shock horror me being positive!!!
      (detail removed by Moderator) I posted as i honestly couldnt see a way out I didnt want to carry on I didnt know how much more i could take I still dont but I guess none of us do. Many of you came to my rescue and for that I will be forever grateful you helped me see that I am not alone and that I can do this. Thank you so much to all of you who messaged me. I honestly dont know where to go from here but I know im not going back to hiding, pretending.
      I see clearly now that hes a narc that he has a problem not me thats all for now I still cant use or believe the abuse word but im learning evsry day its one step foward right? One baby step. (detail removed by Moderator) ive taken on more shifts at work and ive been invited out. Ive not been out without hime in decades the last time he actually came and dragged me out as he said he had seen a picture of me on social media and i looked too drunk i was sober but still that was many many years ago. I dont know if i will have the courage to go for one i will have to cope with his nastiness before and most definatly after and two Im scared i dont know these people well and im so self consious but my counsellor says i need to widen my friendships (i have none) for when and if I get away to be even thinking about going is huge for me so another positive.
      Another tiny step.I know how big a mountain I have to climb but for the first time I want to climb it and Ive made a small start. Anyway I wanted to say Thank you and that Im trying really hard to take on board every bit of advise you ladies give me and im so very very grateful.

    • #134533
      KIP.
      Participant

      It’s good that you’re being encouraged to go out with friends however you have to stay safe and knowing this provoked violence last time I would suggest it will happen again. Concentrate on a safe exit plan then you’re safe to go out as much as you want to x

      • #134534
        nbumblebee
        Participant

        I know i have got to do this I know but why does it seem so hard I just cant seem to get my head around the fact I have to make a plan to keep safe I just cant seem to do it. X

    • #134537
      We can do this
      Participant

      nbumblebee, how you feel now is how I felt (detail removed by Moderator) ago. If you can get yourself out, it’s amazing how the space gives you clarity. I’m not perfect with the no contact but every time I see him now I realise that it’s not me. You can do this my lovely and whether it’s now or in the future, you will get there but do it in your own time. Keep posting, keep focus, keep being you xx

      • #134542
        nbumblebee
        Participant

        Its amazing you got out honestly I dream about it all the time for now its just a dream i guess.
        Thank you so much for your support I hope you continue to be safe that you can now start to heal and smile. Hugs x*x

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