I probably know the answer

[Goodnessgraciousme]

I feel like I am going mad, so please help?

I met my husband in (detail removed by moderator), we got married (detail removed by moderator). I moved from a big city to a small village in with his family (culturally the norm although I don’t personally agree).

We are now (detail removed by moderator) and have toddlers.

Before we got married he said he didn’t drink or take drugs and I never witnessed it. He said hi were close and they all contributed the house as his dad had left when he was (detail removed by moderator). I soon found out none of this was true, but I stayed because I was naive and thought it would be ok or get better.

He would go out and not tell me where he is or would turn his phone off. I would worry like Mad. Most anniversaries, birthdays are ruined because he goes out and gets drunk doesn’t come home. He has done this more times than I can count. He even left me in the hospital when our baby was born, took my money without permission and bought drugs. I was heart broken.

He has stopped the drugs but his communication is terrible and after everything I am always so anxious
(not not mention sad that he doesn’t think it’s important to inform me or keep me updated).

His family are a bit selfish because the sisters don’t include me sometimes or they never really do things as a family & I feel like I am left out because all I ever wanted was to be part of something, but I can’t be part of something that isn’t there.

Fastforward, we are constantly arguing as I feel so misunderstood. Every time I speak about how I feel, I feel shut down. If I cry, he barely cares. I ask for help and I get some but I have to ask so many times.

There’s so many debts because sometimes he pays the bills and other times he doesn’t due to being (detail removed by moderator). His family live in a house we own and don’t always pay the rent which I cover. It’s currently (detail removed by moderator).

He says he loves me but I am unhappy. He has shoved me and caused bruises and also hit my in the face which he says has been an accident.

I grew up around a bit of violence verbal aggression and to me this is normal but it’s screaming abuse and unhealthy.

I feel like I can’t be myself, or relax or enjoy just being at home because I am so unhappy. I try to talk but nothing changes.

[Reallyconfused]

Hi not sure if my message got through but I did respond! If not I will write again. Stay strong – you are not alone. Take care and keep posting.

[Author]

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