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    • #167663
      Toofarr
      Participant

      I reacted and said things I shouldn’t have said to him, he did it on purpose, I feel he was recording me. I feel so pathetic I fell for it. Feel like a horrible mother. After when I messaged him he denied it all. I feel more trapped. I regret it.

    • #167694
      Bananaboat
      Participant

      Don’t be too hard on yourself. You’re only human and it’s natural to have reactions – despite what our abusers say. It sounds like you’re experiencing reactive abuse where they push us and push us until we snap and they can turn round and go ‘look she’s crazy’. You’re not a robot so it’s unrealistic to set yourself a target of never reacting but you can learn to recognise the signs and when to step away. Keep a record of the incident, what he did and the build up – for your own sanity and if ever needed as evidence of some kind (unlikely but better to be safe). Don’t beg for his forgiveness or try to get him to accept he caused it – they don’t accept responsibility but enjoy watching your pain. Look up reactive abuse and get some tips but don’t beat yourself up, it’s ok x

    • #167695
      Stargazing1
      Participant

      I’m so sorry to hear how you have been made too feel. Why do people do that ? I will never understand people. Don’t be cross with yourself you was being made out to be the bad one but it’s not you @Toofarr . We will have all reacted we are only human but it’s the others that push us . Remember it’s not you . Don’t blame yourself please.

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