- This topic has 3 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 4 years, 5 months ago by Iwantmeback.
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13th November 2019 at 8:58 pm #91359AnonymousInactive
I left and said I was going to see friends. He had been lovely towards me the previous night- cuddling up to me in bed and telling me he loved me so much but that came after alcoholic outbursts all week which he blames me for.
After a while he realised baby and I weren’t coming back, he took it really light-heartedly for a while and then it escalated to a drunken phone call from him saying (detail removed by moderator).
He told me I am absolutely awful and mentally unstable. I believe him because I feel either emotional or depressed most of the time.
Without him in my life I have no other adult. I really want to go home. -
13th November 2019 at 9:30 pm #91365LettitgoParticipant
You feel emotional or depressed because of him, aswel as the fact your home is your home and even though hes there, to a certain extent its your comfort zone. By getting out you have taken a massive step and that’s scary I know, as you are entering the unknown……but do not go back, aa the mind games will continue …. I think he has resorted to the threats as he feels hes no longer in control of the situation. Dont let him be, if he even thought about changing or regretting his previous actions prior to you going you wouldnt of had a drunken phone call. Stay strong if for nothing else your baby, who doesn’t need to witness his behaviour xx
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13th November 2019 at 10:43 pm #91372ElephanttrunkParticipant
Stay stong.
If you go back now you will find it so hard to leave again.
Your probably anxious and depressed because of the things that have made you leave, and leaving is a step towards feeling more stable.
Be realistic about what you have lost and gained by leaving.
You have lost a person who gives you hurt, abuse and pain.
You have gained freedom.
Thinking of you x -
14th November 2019 at 8:55 am #91393IwantmebackParticipant
I too felt the need to go back when I left in the beginning, I don’t now, but that feeling is very hard to not feel. It’s all you’ve known, it’s about the future you were supposed to share together, it’s about the familiarity. I promise it’ll get better. I spent my first few months rereading my journals, I’ve still not been able to play back the recordings, maybe I’ll never be able to. Stay strong for your sake and your childs. The damage they do to their own children and us through them is awful,overwhelming and downright cruel.
I wish you peace and a chance to catch yourself smiling, fir no other reason than you’re happy with your life in that moment.
Best wishes IWMB 💞💞
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