3rd October 2022 at 9:50 am #150391
As my title says I did, I went on my own for a local meet up at a coffee shop…. I can’t believe I did it 😁 walked in and introduced myself and had a lovely hour chatting over coffee.
Best bit…. I could do this as I got out of my abusive relationship, I didn’t have to ask his permission, I didn’t feel as anxious as I would have if I had come home to my husband.
I could stay as long as I wanted
Coming home to mine and kids calm home
Meeting new people with no expectations
When I think back to this time last year (I was a mess), I have got much stronger
3rd October 2022 at 12:25 pm #150401Twisted SisterParticipant
Good for you ringing the changes and feeling you made connections and have moved so far forward in your recovery and having that peace.
I do have concerns about the ‘MeetUp’ social media thing, if thats what you used? Purely because for a lot of women arranging a meet up with complete strangers online is really risky.
IDK, it may not have been one of those, and I hope you have made connections with some that maybe good friends. Was it a female meet up?
3rd October 2022 at 6:16 pm #150416
Hi TS, how are you? Thank you for your reply x
It was a female meet up which made it easier as I am not looking to date… I miss company my own age and this little group worked, no pressure, just coffee, walk and chats… I have new friends to walk my dog with too ❤️
3rd October 2022 at 6:22 pm #150418
TS, I am interested in your concerns with Meet up groups please x
3rd October 2022 at 6:34 pm #150423Twisted SisterParticipant
My concern is the same as any online activity, that if you have an abuser in your life, online is a playground, and you can be tracked through local online meeting arrangements. Its a risk for many women, but I am very glad it worked out for you, and I hope this will be the start of some good connections. ts
3rd October 2022 at 12:33 pm #150402Wants To HelpParticipant
It’s so good to read how far you have come, this just goes to show that one small step each day can soon add up to miles of distance between you and your abuser.
This is your future one step at a time; a new social venture, new friends, maybe some female friends to go on a weekend away with, this is just the beginning 🙂
3rd October 2022 at 6:21 pm #150417
Hi WTH, I hope you are ok?
Yes it was a step towards my future, something which has had nothing to do with him 😁 so it wasn’t ruined, I didn’t have to do anything sexual to go out, I didn’t have the anxiety of his mood and I wasn’t afraid to be me as I am now. I am enough even though I have a long road ahead, my children and I will be alright and is alright that we are not ok somedays…. I couldn’t have said that a year ago
3rd October 2022 at 6:29 pm #150421
3rd October 2022 at 6:28 pm #150420
My gosh this is amazing what balls that took. Well done you.
Hope you are so proud.
Onwards and upwards sweetie.
Am routing for you I really am.
Keep going. Sending hugs xxxxxx
3rd October 2022 at 6:55 pm #150424MarmaladeParticipant
That sounds great Hereforhelp. I am so pleased for you. It took strength.
I have been advised to look at these sort of things, but haven’t plucked up the courage yet.
It would be nice to have a network of local friends (I have long distance friends).
I am encouraged by your experience! Keep us updated.
3rd October 2022 at 10:37 pm #150428SingleMomSurvivorParticipant
Thank you so much for sharing!! This is such wonderful news!! ❤️❤️
4th October 2022 at 8:40 pm #150469EyesopeningParticipant
Hey my lovely, so happy to hear your lovely recent experiences and to hear your doing well ❤️❤️❤️❤️
24th November 2022 at 12:40 pm #152205
Excellent work – socialising and meeting people always good – congratulations on this step.
24th November 2022 at 6:32 pm #152236
Stronglife, how are you? .. I have been on some more meet ups, including a party! I had a lovely fun evening, dancing, chatting and one or 2 drinks 😁 then home alone into my pj’s and snuggled down. I have made a couple of friends, I go when I want to, i am already looking forward to the next meet ❤️
24th November 2022 at 9:39 pm #152247
I can almost hear and feel your joy bless you.
Keep going you are amazing ❤💜
5th November 2023 at 1:25 am #162907
I go to meetups on and off. Some are good – some not so good – it’s a luck of the draw.
I am careful on all social networking sites especially meetup. It’s good once you get the hang of it to meet others etc.
24th November 2022 at 7:41 pm #152239AwayfromhomeParticipant
Reading this my heart warmed up. This is just what I was telling my mum. When I have my Olea e i can invite my friends over anytime without having to worry about “mess” and “pet hair”; I can go anywhere without being looking at the clock. Cannot wait for this!
Well done you xx
26th November 2022 at 10:50 am #152309
Thanks ❤️ I have a planned drinks/party meet up next… planning what to wear is now fun as I do not have to consider what my ex thinks is appropriate! I can wear a thong and heels if I wish with a feather headress (might be too cold in just a thong 🤣 you know what I mean though!).
7th December 2022 at 6:32 am #152825
Glad you found local meetup – I’m looking to ongoing social group to ie sports clubs that are organised by committees and ongoing clubs etc. it’s not easy as they can b costly.
Glad you found ongoing people and meet ups for coffee etc. it makes a difference
7th December 2022 at 8:27 am #152844
Hi Stronglife, I have been to different meetups (minimum spend as I don’t have much money … coffee mornings, crafts, walking… it is nice to chat to women as me, not the abused me but as the woman I am now becoming.
7th December 2022 at 8:40 am #152846Wants To HelpParticipant
The new women we become are stronger because of what we went through. We never fully recover but we can live a great life in Recovery.
It’s so lovely to read your transformation as I remember your first posts on here and how much you were struggling to leave… and now you are soaring 😁
9th December 2022 at 6:07 pm #152927
Hi WTH… I remember and your support has been and still is so helpful ❤️
I saw my parents today and my mum commented on how well I look now 😊 I am stronger now, still have wobbles and will need support (which I am so grateful to have) but I am working on myself and far more mentally present for my children as when my husband was here I was too mentally exhausted to be truly present with my children.
How are you? ❤️ HFH
7th December 2022 at 10:12 am #152850lostrainbowParticipant
This sounds amazing, I have not long left and I have no friends. I’m so happy for you, took a lot of guts as others have said. I’ve been really wobbly, but it gives me hope that I can do it too. Thank you for sharing.
Hope you’re having a good day x*x
7th December 2022 at 2:09 pm #152856
Thank you all for your support.. it did take a lot of guts to walk in on my own as me who I am now but I am so glad I did 😊 anything to keep moving forwards xx
6th January 2023 at 8:29 pm #154169
So true – just people – I am finding the cheaper ones ie meet for coffee etc. there has been limited of these and one was cancelled- got one coming up. Cheaper.
Just a hint on this – I have profile name with no photo and another name to stop tracking.
7th January 2023 at 10:06 pm #154224
Ah I Hope you enjoy it 😊 and yes, me too in case of tracking x*x
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