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    • #124672
      SILKIE
      Participant

      Hi my life is falling apart. On (detail removed by moderator) my doctor told me I was the victim of Domestic Abuse, Coercive control, intimidation. Fast forward to (detail removed by moderator). The local Domestic Abuse agency have escalated my case to high risk because my husband was a (detail removed by moderator) ago and apparently has access to (detail removed by moderator) plus continued suicide threats. (detail removed by moderator) night at (detail removed by moderator), I get a call from the police who have had a call from the the agency. They arrive an hour later and tell me I have to choice… non molestation order or have him arrested. They visit him after but tell him it’s not me who has reported him.

      Yesterday, not (detail removed by moderator) later, there isn’t enough to arrest him! why did they say there was??

      My doctor, who was so serious and asked why I didn’t report it sooner said if this is what happened, then you must listen to the agency.

      Even my own sister blamed me for not telling people this happened…’you’ve never said you were scared!’

      I’ve been thrown into the middle of this and now everyone who said it’s real is pulling away and I’m back to where I started… no one is really bothered, it feels like it’s no big deal and well perhaps ‘it’s not that bad’!!

      Is this it???? Doesn’t anyone really believe me???? Did I imagine it??

    • #124676
      beachhut
      Participant

      Hello SILKIE,

      Please don’t feel alone and that no one believes you. It is not nice when you are told one thing by agencies and the police and what happens is not what was expected. They I am sure believe what you have told them but may need just that bit more evidence to take it any further. I believe you and know how difficult it is to make that decision to get the police involved, it is not something we ever expected to happen. Please take care, you did the right thing. We are all here for you.

      Take care of you, beachhutXx

    • #124678
      SILKIE
      Participant

      Thank you @beachhut but this morning it’s feeling harder than ever to see any kind of future. I know it happened but at this point, it feels like he is winning. It’s starting to feel like he will get all the help for being an emotional abuser. I’m starting to realise that women don’t come forward because they have an uphill battle, just to be listened to and believed.

    • #124717
      Darcy
      Participant

      Hi beautiful Angel … Silkie,
      I am saddened to hear you are alone and have no support.
      I also experienced this feeling and I know it’s hard to see this now but take power from it.
      When no one helped me it was a massive wake up call for me that the only person that could save me was myself.
      I had no idea how, or when but I knew if I didn’t no one would.
      This is when I started to strengthen myself from the inside out, practicing self love, and self worth work which in turn strengthen my boundaries, empowered me and gave me the push I needed to eventually leave.
      I also strengthen my body physically, I started to practice yoga and just generally get out in nature for walks as much as I could, not that easy I know in a controlling relationship.
      It took time and practice but the work I invested in myself paid off to the life that I now live.
      You are not alone, you have access to this forum so take strength, advice and guidance from the beautiful earth angels on here.
      As always I recommend reading or listening to Louise Hay, You Can Heal Your Life
      Stay connected on the forum, we are supporting you
      Sending you continued love and support
      Darcy xx

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