I’m doing this if it kills me!!

[Janedoeissad]

He’s cancelled his trip, at least til next week.

I should be gutted. As this is when I am planning to leave but I’m not.

I’m glad he will get his news out of the way. Whatever the news is im gone when he finally goes away.

I’m glad I get the extra week or two to gather up more evidence he’s a p***k which will make me more determined to leave.

The extra (detail removed by moderator) weeks will give me chance to distance myself more and work on feeling guilty less often.

I’m so leaving and this set back is a bump in the road, I WILL get there.

Every set back makes me more determined. So b****y bring it on!!

[Ayanna]

Can you send him to the pub?
Is there anything that keeps him out of the house for a few hours so that you can leave?

[Janedoeissad]

Nope. He has an office at home. He has no friends and no hobbies which do not involve me.

He’s never out the house more then a couple of hours with work so I can’t do anything during the week.

If this weekend away doesn’t happen I have a plan b. A sure fire way to get him out the house for 12 hours but I’m ok waiting a week or two. I’d have to have a week or so to plan getting him out the house for the day anyway. If anything is arranged to quick he’ll get suspicious. Sometimes in life you have to be patient.

I can’t explain it but something is telling me waiting the week or so will be the right thing to do.

[Ayanna]

Do what your instincts tell you.
It seems you are in tune with them. xx

[Confused123]

hey hun

u seem to be in control which is brill, follow your gut and do the plan as u see fit

[Janedoeissad]

Hi all

Thanks for your messages.

The more I wait for my leaving date and the more things get in the way, for some reason (which I can not understand at the moment!) I get more mad, I get angry that I just can not turn to him and say I am leaving and that’s his fault for the way he has treated me. He’s put my in a position where I have to plan my escape. I now feel that he is in my way, he is stopping me living the life I want and I am angry.

The more open my eyes are to what has been going on, the more abusive behavior I see (the more subtle, underhand, sly stuff), and I get more mad again. I have to restrain myself. To stop myself simply getting up and walking out. I have to keep myself safe and I always will but I am so mad at him.

I think my mind has left, it has already walked away and is ignoring any negative comments, verbal abuse. It is only my body which is really still here. If that makes sense.

I’ve decided to keep hold of this steely determination and try to channel it whenever I have doubts.

I think now I have some very good support, I feel powerful and I know what I have to do.

I might feel completely different tomorrow! but for now, I am enjoying this feeling of determination.

[Tiffany]

Hey Jane, I was just wondering how you were getting on. You sound powerful! Enjoy it! I hope that he does go away, but it sounds like you have things in hand even if he doesn’t.
All the best, Tiffany

[Lisa]

Hi Jane,

I just wanted to drop you a little line of support and to say please go carefully. Please don’t let him know what you are planning as it could make your situation dangerous. The helpline can also talk to you about some safety planning.

We are all here for you.

Best wishes,

Lisa
Forum Moderator

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