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    • #138388
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Hi
      I am hoping you lovely people on here will be able to understand how I am feeling.
      I have bought something ( not for me) and not that expensive. I would not normally buy anything like this without checking with him first. But I have…and I am proud of myself. At the same time, I am also nervous and a bit scared as I know there will be repercussions.
      Does anyone else feel like this at times?
      Xx

    • #138439
      Anonymous
      Inactive

      Oh yes , but for different reasons, for the first time I’ve ignored and blocked all his contact , threats , manipulating behaviour etc , normally I would have answered something, so I feel proud of myself for ignoring all his tactics so far , for being strong , but like you anxious at the thought of paybacks, I try not to think of repercussions I mite face from doing what I have decided to do , but try and look at it like any comebacks I face in future will have no effect on me as Iam in control of me and my future now , whatever you throw at me you do not effect me anymore as you have no control over me in anyway . Condition your mind to think I don’t need to ask this person permission for anything my money , my life I can do what I want when I want you play no part in it now . I’m living my life free from your control and enjoying myself in every way .

      • #138447
        nbumblebee
        Participant

        @TheDuchess I love this. Good for you x

    • #138442
      Teaandcats
      Participant

      I get what you mean too.

      Whenever I am able to hold my nerve and not answer the phone, I feel like I’ve achieved something. But also feel that terror about the consequences for going against him… I’m utterly terrified of how he’s going to respond the next time I have to see him (children).

    • #138443
      Teaandcats
      Participant

      Well done 🙂

    • #138446
      nbumblebee
      Participant

      There must be something in the air as I did this too. I brought myself something from my own wages which meant so so much I actually cried.
      I didnt have to ask and i didnt have to pay him back with doing what he wants me to do. He is not happy not happy at all but cant say anything its my money and my god it feels so good doesnt it?
      Massive well done sweetie its takes courage and its another baby step foward whatever you brought go enjoy it. Sending hugs xxxxx

    • #138544
      Gerbil
      Participant

      Thank you for you comments.
      I was so proud of myself. Now I am scared of how he is reacting and am anxious. He gave me the silent treatment for a short while and then shouted and swore a lot. I suppose it was inevitable but I suppose I always had some hope that he would not react.
      I have kept very calm. He has been nice now for maybe (detail removed by moderator) weeks so I suppose I knew deep down, he would revert back to normal.
      I am so glad to be able to share on here as I don’t think many people would be able to understand this.
      Take care everyone. X

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