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    • #133640


      Its been (detail removed by Moderator) months since I left I am still struggling to come to terms with what happened I have good and bad days. I just keep wondering when I will get over this I have got family but I think they are starting to think I should just forget what happened and get on with my life but I feel I need to process and talk through with someone what happened or even how I am feeling because I never want to repeat the mistakes I have made been involved with the type of person he was.

      When I left it was sudden, unplanned I just knew I had to leave I could no longer live with his behaviour, temper and rage when he lost it. I had to leave my home which we jointly owned, moved to a different area over (detail removed by Moderator) miles away and I had to leave my job. I just felt traumatised and in shock I tried anti-depressants but felt worse so had to come off them.

      I am struggling with emotional support at the moment do you have to be referred for the Freedom course or can you do a self-referral yourself?

      Ive been reading some of the posts when Ive been really low and just felt I was ready to post I have contacted my GP previously but waiting lists for counselling I have been told could take months.

      Has anyone got any good self-help books they can recommend?


    • #133713
      Main Moderator

      Hi Nogoingback,

      Welcome to the forum and thank you for sharing with us. I hope you find the support you are looking for here with others who understand.

      If you would like some ongoing support then your local domestic abuse support service can often offer counselling and emotional support. You can find your local service via this link: They may also offer the Freedom Programme or similar.

      Also, Supportline can offer confidential emotional support-

      You are doing the right thing by reaching out for support. Please do keep posting to us when you are able to, it can really help to offload on here.

      Take care,


    • #133722

      Hello no going back welcome to the forum. You are so brave leaving as you did you have had to completely uproot yourself to get free and that alone let alone surviving abuse is massive. Please be gentle with yourself you will and can heal but it takes time. You deserve support – there are books recommended on here i will try and find the list and bump it up the forum if and you tube videos. But nothing beats real life support – try women’s aid, they can get you on a freedom project I think. I left in the same way – can you try doing some things to help you through the day a walk, yoga, a bath, a nice candle? Can you find a new hobby or even volunteer when you are ready? Baby steps and sending you all my best wishes. I’m a bit further on still some terrible days but more and more good ones – it will get better be kind to yourself x

    • #133849

      Thank you for the replies. I had a bad start to the beginning of the week frustrated at the position I am in but I am feeling a bit better it is true you have good and bad days and hopefully things will get better soon as things get sorted – but it takes such a long time and it is so frustrating I sometimes feel powerless.

      Watersprite I am going to try taking up one/two of your suggestions I might trying taking up a new hobby especially on a weekend. I never thought in a million years I would be in the position I am in, in such a short period of time but I am going to try contacting womens aid and see if they can get me on the freedom project. It does help viewing some of the posts because it makes you realise you are not the only one experiencing this trauma. During lockdown I had problems accessing information privately for help when things got really bad but at least now I can try and get some emotional support and at least I’m sleeping better.


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