17th November 2023 at 12:08 am #163251LostnaloneParticipant
Very newly out!! Still so very raw and gut wrenching!! I’m constantly reading and learning. This forum is life changing. Knowledge is definitely power!! I miss and love him so much however the pain and suffering for many yrs does eventually out way the good times and memories so I hope!! 💔 starting from nothing is soul destroying yet it only as to be start once more and its mine alone forever!! I can see him now for what he is now!! Its not easy and I stil don’t sleep or want talk to anybody but I do believe with time comes recovery!!xxxx
17th November 2023 at 10:22 pm #163278LisaMain Moderator
Thank you so much for your honesty in sharing this with us, and for bringing some of that hope to others here on the Forum.
It’s so wonderful to hear that you are experiencing change and that things are feeling brighter for you. What you have shared is really encouraging and I’m sure it will mean a lot to others reading this.
Take care and do keep posting to let us know how you’re doing.
18th November 2023 at 2:15 am #163284swanlakeParticipant
Thinking of you.
I was mentally unwell after deciding to no longer contact my abuser.
Wishing you lots of recovery from the pain and suffering.
18th November 2023 at 6:20 pm #163305LostnaloneParticipant
Thankyou Swanlake and Lisa. Swanlake the pain is definitely the hardest. I didn’t think my mental health was to bad either until this week and it’s hit me like a brick!! If only I could turn my brain off for just a minute. I come on here when I’m low and I can rely on this forum to keep me going when the twisted thoughts kick in!!Swanlake take care beautiful 😍 x*x
18th November 2023 at 6:52 pm #163310maddogParticipant
Well done for getting out! It’s quite a ride moving from loving someone to recognising them basically as pathetic, damaged little man-child.
It’s difficult to recognise that we’ve been projecting what we think of love onto someone who’s missing a bit in their development.
There’s masses of help out there to hold your hand through your learning, understanding and recovery.
We’ve all fallen in love with someone who wasn’t real, someone who at their core can’t love and it’s such a kick in the teeth to feel so utterly used in every way possible. It’s normal to grieve. The good thing is that you can recover, you can heal and learn to keep yourself safe. He’s stuck on endless repeat until either he’s stopped or he’s dead.
It’s important to remember in these difficult times that every time you get out of bed, clean your teeth and make yourself a cup of tea that these are acts of kindness to yourself. Your GP should be a helpful ally, and there are organisations which offer counselling depending on your needs.
18th November 2023 at 8:02 pm #163317swanlakeParticipant
I’ve had medication and counselling, lots of domestic violence groups and therapeutic mental health groups. The littlest act of self care like getting out of bed can be hard some days. I haven’t been able to work full time for years. I try then I burn out after a few months. I’m very grateful for this forum.
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