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    • #168632

      Sorry to rant. I have been abroad to visit my mum after some devastating news. Before I left we were having yet another fall out. So much so I’m banished to the spare room and he’s acting like he lives in a batchelor pad doing nothing so I’m having to go round and pick up the pieces. I think he’s waiting for a reaction which he won’t get. The day I left he just said “Hope it all goes ok” like I was a stranger. All I wanted was his arms around me. While away I heard nothing. He told me he’d blocked me on his phone so I made no attempt to contact him. He didn’t message once to ask how I was or my mum. I’m now not knowing how to be when I get home. Was I wrong to expect him to be concerned because he’ll tell me if I air my feelings that I have expectations and that we weren’t getting on that’s why he didn’t get in touch. Is it expectations? I know that shoe on the other foot I would have shown concern and put us to one side in such difficult times. I don’t know how to be around him when I get back. I don’t want him to ask me about things because he could t be bothered while I was away. Oh I get so caught up in knots because whatever I do or say he’ll have an answer for it or it will be wrong. I’m so upset to not have had his support yet again and I know he’ll say it’s because we aren’t getting he right. I don’t know anymore.

    • #168661
      Main Moderator

      Hi Munchkin04,

      Thank you for sharing with us. I am sorry to hear you have had difficult news to deal with. The lack of support from him must have felt really disappointing during what sounds like a stressful time. I hope posting on the forum has helped to offload some of your thoughts.

      Keep posting to us when you can.

      Best wishes,


    • #168665

      Hi munchkin, this situation must be causing you a lot of anxiety and understandably so. He has no right to banish you and expect you to serve/clear up after him… these are typical abuser behaviours, they feel entitled to whatever they want to suit them.

      He isn’t engaging or emotionally present in the relationship and withdrawing like he has when you needed him is cruel of him. As you.say, if the shoe was on the other foot you would show.concern, that’s because you are a kind, compassionate woman and you expect the same which is normal in a healthy relationship, he is choosing to treat you this way. It is so against moat of our natures to be cruel/abusive that when we are treated that way it is hard to believe.

      Keep posting and keep reaching out
      Hugs ❤️ HFH

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