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      Mummytwobehappy
      Participant

      *** long post- trigger warning emotional abuse and n********t***

      Hi there, I’m new to the group. Not sure where to start… I’ve been with my husband for nearly (removed by moderator)years. We got together when I was (removed by moderator) and he was (removed by moderator)… we had been together just (removed by moderator) before I found out I was pregnant! Now all our relationship life he has always been right and not really liked me going out with my friends etc but I thought that’s because he moved town away from his family to be with me. But obviously being young and “in love” I always brushed it aside until I got to my mid twenties and started to realise actually this isn’t right.. there was times I couldn’t go out with my friends because we would argue or where I couldn’t go to my best friends (removed by moderator) which caused arguments between me and my friend. Then on my (removed by moderator), he would be constantly texting me saying how much he misses me, asking what’s going on, why am I getting pulled up on stage etc… the next day he went into complete melt down I had to pretend to all my friends and family that our daughter was poorly to end my (removed by moderator) early because he was round a family friends house having a emotional breakdown! Then he did it again when I was on his (removed by moderator), my first weekend at (removed by moderator) but I ended up pretending I was poorly and go back to the hotel room because my hubby wouldn’t stop calling or texting me crying! He has to know who I’m going with, where I’m going, I have to set a time with him I’ll be home and if I’m not home by that point he will be constantly Calling and texting. He is very much all about himself, our conversations are always based on him and his hobbies etc… I never get asked how my day was. I constantly have to show him love and affection and if I say I’m going out for a meal with friends he will moan about how we never go out when he doesn’t even make plans to go out together. He has got jealous of our children before, he always wants to be cuddled or ridiculous close to me, I hate always being cuddled up but he sulks if I don’t. When we have a disagreement he will normally lose his temper and break things or throw things, like his phone or smash a plate etc there is soo much more I could write! But past (removed by moderator) months I’ve began to stick up for myself and try to do things for me, some of my friends have told me he is emotionallly abusing me.. I’ve been in denial as I’m a people pleaser and didn’t want to admit to it and deal with the hassle! It wasn’t until (removed by moderator) we had a massive argument and I stormed out declaring I was done! After I told him everything they way he makes me feel, how he controls me, I don’t know who I am anymore, etc… he stayed at his (removed by moderator) to give us a break and he has been doing a lot of researching and realised he emotionally abuses me and is a n********t, he wants to prove to me he can change! he has reffered himself to taking therapies, been put on anti depressants, spoken to a domestic abuse charity who are looking up a course for him to go on and then they can offer me support… but I need a professional to talk too as well. Just need some advice really, I want to give him a chance as I can see he is really trying. Has anyone stayed with their partner or has a partner been on one of these courses?

      Thanks for reading and sorry for long post!

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