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    • #123755
      Pea2020
      Participant

      Hi everyone,

      I’m not sure if anyone will remember me or not…
      I messaged almost daily on here in the run up to Xmas…

      I finally left (detail removed by moderator) and am now in my new home.

      I honestly wouldn’t have been able to do it without the support of everyone on here. You kept things straight in my head, when I was determined to doubt myself and tell myself I was making it all up.

      Life is so much better now. But it can be hard still sometimes too.
      It took a while to get used to making decisons about the smallest of things, like what I was going to eat for lunch and whether to go out and buy milk.
      I went through a brief period of absolute peace and calm and I felt the safest I’ve felt for a long time… but I’ve started getting nightmares on the past week.

      Anyway, I just wanted to pop on here again and say thank you and that now I’m more settled, I want to start being more active on this forum again and help support you all, the way you have supported me 🙂

    • #123759
      Cantmakedecisons
      Participant

      I remember you Pea2020 I read a lot of your posts.. I’m so glad to read that you’ve left and are rebuilding life.

      You should feel very proud of your strength you’ve come such a long way.

      Sending hugs and even more strength for your difficult days.. you’ve got this xx

    • #123760
      KIP.
      Participant

      Hey well done you. My experience was very similar. When he was arrested I had a period of euphoria but then the PTSD kicked in which happens when the brain feels safe and starts to process the trauma we suppressed. I’d definitely recommend some therapy so talk to your GP and learn what you can about trauma so you’re prepared. The Body Keeps The Score is a good book and Healing From Hidden Abuse by Shannon Thomas. Be kind to yourself as you heal from this abuse. You will get there. Therapy can help cope with the symptoms. Mindfulness. Walking. Eat well and keep hydrated. It can become exhausting dealing with the trauma but you will get through this. I had panic, flashbacks, night terrors and night mares.

    • #123763
      Hawthorn
      Participant

      Hi Pea!

      So great to hear you’ve escaped and are enjoying your new-found freedom. The marvel of the peace when you leave and the strength you feel from making the choice and getting out are very precious, but it takes time to get used to making choices for yourself so be patient with yourself. With time and practice it gets easier, and so enjoyable! I still remember the first time I went shopping, many months after getting out, and knowing what clothes I liked and wanted to buy! It was magic!

      The rollercoaster continues for awhile after you leave, recovery too can follow a cycle of highs and lows. It does level out but please reach out for lots of support. KIP has given great advice, and in my own experience counselling and attending a support group have been invaluable in my recovery. Resilience is learning to rely on yourself, but it’s also about knowing how to reach out for help and building a support network around you.

      Really delighted to hear how things are moving forward for you. It’s not an easy journey, but it’s yours. Your life and choices are your own again, I hope you are so proud of yourself for taking your power back. Big hugs xx

    • #123772
      Watersprite
      Participant

      Welcome Back I remember you – well done!!! Enjoy those simple pleasures I smile every time I get into my safe bed at night and recently treated myself to some lovely bedding and he would have hated it! Keep hold on the difficult times of just how far you have come and now you are in control of your life. Sooo brave – the clarity that comes when you leave is amazing isn’t it x

    • #123802
      Empoweredhealing
      Participant

      Congratulations! That’s so good to hear. You are well on your way in the journey towards peace and healing.

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